160. Perseverance and the Power of Negative Self-Talk

What’s it take to keep going when your mind screams “quit”?

In this Dennis Rox episode, Mike, Eldar, Toliy, and Harris tackle perseverance—from rock climbing grit to sales call grind. Mike shares a raw tale of battling a red trail, pushing past mental exhaustion to grab that last grip. Harris ties it to SEALs swimming the Hudson, wondering why his sales “drown proofing” hasn’t clicked. Eldar flips the script: Are we sabotaging success out of fear? Toliy insists it’s you vs. you—not the world. Expect laughs (purple dildos?), fire (sales war metaphors!), and real talk on silencing negative self-talk to unlock your inner badass. Tune in—perseverance ain’t just for heroes!

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Chapters

• 0:21 Defining Perseverance
• 8:03 Comparing Perseverance in Different Contexts
• 37:16 Overcoming Personal Barriers
• 47:17 Overcoming Adversity and Seeking Help
• 1:14:09 The Mindset of Champions
• 1:20:43 The Laziness Myth
• 1:43:06 Negative Self-Talk
• 1:50:41 Final Thoughts on Perseverance

Transcript

[00:00:00] Mike: On this week's episode, 

[00:00:02] Harris: even sitting in on the call reviews, I still have the pit in my stomach. I still take the hit of the vape. Yeah. 'cause uh, I'm still waiting for the Yeah. The punch, the, the hammer to drop. 

[00:00:11] Toliy: Yeah. These hammers are going to continue to hit us over the head until we um, take a proactive role.

[00:00:19] Toliy: Yeah. Until we take a proactive role. So like, okay, so is a proactive role, perseverance? 

[00:00:25] Eldar: Can you point the finger at yourself and say genuinely and accept the fact that you are the reason for your failure. If you can, then you have to act. 

[00:00:33] Toliy: That's the thing I have a big problem with, is the, the lack of acting.

[00:00:43] Eldar: All right guys, another good one here. I think, uh, perseverance, right? A lot of people talk about persevering and whatever it is they're trying to persevere in, right? Harris, to relate this to you, and then Mike can give us his personal example, maybe. Would you say you're persevering here? Yeah. How so? 

[00:01:05] Harris: And why?

[00:01:05] Harris: Persevering is like, uh, surviving. Keep going. Pushing. That's right. 

[00:01:10] Eldar: Falling down. Keep getting up. Trying again. I'm 

[00:01:13] Harris: still 

[00:01:13] Eldar: here, ain't I? You are. So to some degree, right? Um, perseverance, I guess is a, is a point at which you have not reached your destination or a level of success that you're looking for or progress, right?

[00:01:27] Eldar: But you keep falling down. But nonetheless, you get up and you try again. You get up, you try again, you get up, you try again. 

[00:01:33] Harris: Yeah. Probably done it like a hundred times by, 

[00:01:35] Eldar: so, yeah. So perseverance, right? Um, right. Perseverance end at some point. When does it end? If you quit, when should it end? Right? Um, if you quit.

[00:01:46] Eldar: Yeah. Is it good? Is it bad? Is it one of those things where you have to find the middle ground in perseverance? Um, Mike? Mm-hmm. What do you think about. Perseverance things since you had a, a very personal example mm-hmm. About persevering recently? 

[00:02:04] Mike: Uh, yeah. I think it's per, uh, persevering, but I also think there's some other word I would use to like, uh Okay.

[00:02:12] Mike: Touch it with, to, to my situation. Mm-hmm. Um, but couple days ago I went to the gym. Mm-hmm. I went rock climbing. Whoa. Whoa. It's a new thing that we just started. Mm-hmm. And, um, I went to try a climb, which is, um, I've been working on for a little while. Mm-hmm. And I think the day before I spent like an hour and a half just strictly on that one, you know?

[00:02:41] Mike: Mm-hmm. And, and then I came back the next day and I was having a. Like, uh, something was happening. I wasn't really sure what was happening, but I couldn't make it to the end of the trail, you know? I 

[00:02:56] Eldar: was Can you explain what, what the trail means to the people that don't rock climb? What does that mean? I understand because I went with you, so, but can you explain like the, I guess the mechanics or things behind rock climbing?

[00:03:06] Mike: Sure. So, um, there's a starting position, you know, where you have to hold with both hands mm-hmm. On one or two grips. Right. And your feet's supposed to be on the wall or you know, on foot grips, whatever. And you go through a different trail, which is a whole bunch of different grips with your hands, you know, and you climbing in all different kind of positions left.

[00:03:28] Mike: Right. You know, you have to cross your feet, you have to cross your hands, like, and sometimes you can hold with a full hand. Sometimes you hold three fingers, four fingers, even two fingers, you know, maybe even one. And each 

[00:03:38] Eldar: trail is color coded. 

[00:03:39] Mike: It's color coded. Yeah. And there's also different difficulties, like, uh, levels of difficulty.

[00:03:45] Mike: Yeah. And different kinds of grips. So. There's some grips that are from the top, from the bottom, from the side, some that are just strictly fingers, some that you could put your full hand on, so mm-hmm. It's a whole lot of like, it's a whole world of, um, yeah. Climbing to simulate, I guess if you were to climb outside, which is, you know, again, on a rock that has like, no, like design.

[00:04:06] Mike: Yeah. But it has some design, I guess natural design. So, um, there's a starting point is an ending point, and the whole part, you know, that's the call, that's what I call the trail, you know? Are you following man? 

[00:04:19] Harris: Yeah, I, all right. Good man. I've you, I've seen the videos. Oh, you've seen the videos? Okay. I've seen the videos.

[00:04:23] Mike: Okay. So this red trail, it's um, it's the one I've been going, going on, um, for those, for that first date. And then the second day when I came back, it was a challenging one for you. It's a challenging one. Yeah. So I get to the last grip. Mm-hmm. And I couldn't reach the, I mean, I got to the first to last and I couldn't get to the last one.

[00:04:44] Mike: Mm-hmm. You know, because by the time I get there, I feel like I'm tired and I don't have like, the energy to, to reach it, you know, I feel like I'm tired, physically tired, right? Mm-hmm. So on the second day I came back, um, I started, you know, I started climbing other stuff 'cause I didn't want to like, get stuck on that one.

[00:05:07] Mike: So I climbed a whole bunch of trails, maybe seven or eight ones. Not as difficult as that one, obviously, but, um, but you know. I was just more like working out and having fun. You know? I didn't want to like go into the red one 'cause I know it's like it'll take up my whole day and I wanted to step away, kind of change the scenery so you better hurry up.

[00:05:27] Mike: Okay, sure. Because he's falling asleep. He's, he's falling asleep. Okay. I'm sorry, you went back 

[00:05:31] Harris: to the red one. 

[00:05:32] Mike: Sorry. I, at the end of my second day, the workout went back to the red one. Yeah. And I'm start, I get halfway through of the trail. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, already feeling like, yo, I'm ready to give up now.

[00:05:41] Mike: Like, I'm ready. Like mentally I'm checked out. Mm. You know, but I'm, but I keep, what happens is I keep pushing. Mm-hmm. And I keep going past again, I keep going higher and higher. Yeah. Yeah. And again, almost reach the last grip. Yeah. And I think on the second day I grabbed the grip. Mm-hmm. But my left hand slipped.

[00:05:58] Mike: So like, I actually touched the last grip. Yeah. But I slipped off 'cause it was like a serious reach. Yeah. And then I rested a few minutes and I went back to it again and again, I got high. So I get high and I'm progressing. But as I'm climbing, I mentally feel like I'm finished. Right. But mm-hmm. I'm like, okay, let, fuck this.

[00:06:16] Mike: Lemme keep trying. And as I keep trying, I keep getting further. I'm like, yo, all right. You know, like, what the fuck is happening? I don't understand. Mm. You know, um, so I called Tolli, you know? Mm-hmm. Uh, you know, to tell him like this story, which was to me, which is like, I didn't make any sense because I'm like, Hey, if I'm mentally giving up here, how am I still physically going forward?

[00:06:37] Mike: This doesn't make any sense. Like, I thought I'm done. Yeah. But I keep going. Okay. And, uh, that's, that's, um, that's the whole thing about, about, that's the whole story about the mm-hmm. Thing. And then me and totally had a conversation mm-hmm. About it. And then I started to think about other stuff and about realize, like, you know, thinking about,

[00:06:57] Mike: um, probably a perseverance and also how the mind plays tricks on us, you know, on me, especially on that one. Yeah. Uh, where it says like, immensely give up, but. Then the mind sends a signal to the body like, Hey, you're done. Mm-hmm. You got nothing left. But if you push through that point, you realize you still have more fuel in the tank.

[00:07:19] Mike: Why do you think you have this? Well, I think I personally have this because I've never been like very competitive. Mm-hmm. You know, and I've never like, uh, in that, I don't know, in other things, maybe in that I always had a hard time. I didn't push myself. I don't feel like, uh, I mean, I, I'd be curious to hear what you know, 'cause I said this atto, I said, I wonder if this also translates into other stuff, aspects of my life.

[00:07:45] Mike: But I didn't really think about that. Am I not persevering in anything or am I, am I persevering stuff and just this thing because it's a competitive thing against myself. I'm having a difficult time. Yes, Harris. 

[00:08:00] Harris: I've heard a lot like this. Right. Stories I listen to a lot of, um, you're gonna make fun of it, but I listen to podcasts.

[00:08:07] Harris: It goes on this. Oh, you 

[00:08:08] Toliy: do? 

[00:08:09] Harris: Yes. Whoa. Uh, there's, I forgot what his name is, but he runs like, uh, he's a former veteran, all this shit. Mm-hmm. And they talk about situations that have happened with other veterans, you know, uh mm-hmm. Certain missions, and they talk about all this stuff and they say, you know, when you really talk about it and you really hear the effects of certain missions mm-hmm.

[00:08:31] Harris: It doesn't seem humanly possible that this shit happened. 

[00:08:36] Harris: Hmm. 

[00:08:36] Harris: And you know, uh, they all talked about similar, what you were talking about, how, you know, they were fucking exhausted, but they knew they had to keep pushing. They had to fucking get this shit done. They had to fucking survive. 

[00:08:48] Toliy: Mm-hmm. 

[00:08:49] Harris: And they said, you know, a portion of it was adrenaline.

[00:08:51] Harris: Okay. Others, you know, it was them pushing. Right. It was the per. Like Mike said, perseverance. Mm-hmm. Right. You knew you had to get this done. You knew, you know, it was either you're gonna get the shit done or you're gonna fucking die. 

[00:09:06] Eldar: Well, that's a big kicker. 

[00:09:07] Harris: Yeah. I mean, I mean, I keep hearing the same thing.

[00:09:09] Harris: I keep hearing that word. Perseverance. You gotta persevere. You gotta keep pushing. Yeah. You gotta keep pushing. 

[00:09:14] Eldar: But it's different when your life's on the line. No. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, there's a crazy bear chasing you. But just, 

[00:09:21] Harris: it's another thing like, you know, I was listening to one of the stories where, you know, several of his fucking comrades were wounded and he took on like 20, 30 of these fucking guys, and he pushed and he pushed and he is fucking exhausted.

[00:09:39] Harris: His body was exhausted. Everything was exhausted. Mm-hmm. Somehow. Our bodies are able to, our minds are able to keep us pushing. 

[00:09:49] Eldar: There you go. That's a very interesting point right there. I think that's what Mike was alluding to, is that, look, you might be reading in that moment that your body's kind of like, Hey, we're done here, 

[00:09:59] Harris: but there's still more juice in that tank, boy.

[00:10:01] Harris: Yes. Mm-hmm. 

[00:10:01] Eldar: But like if you introduce a kicker of like somebody's trying to kill you, for example, right? Mm-hmm. But if that, you find energy Yeah. And your mind, right? Mm-hmm. Perseveres, right? 

[00:10:10] Harris: And you also gotta think, is there adrenaline? Does the adrenaline have a part? Correct. 'cause he has to have adrenaline going through his body, climbing the shit.

[00:10:19] Harris: Correct. 

[00:10:20] Eldar: 100%. 100. There is a, there is it the 

[00:10:22] Harris: adrenaline giving a kickstart to your brain that says, 

[00:10:25] Eldar: you can fucking do this. But that's the thing. How does the mind tap in into that adrenaline and kickstart it, right? Mm-hmm. Because the first time we climbed a lot of adrenaline. Second time. Mm-hmm. You know, still adrenaline.

[00:10:37] Eldar: Third, fourth, fifth, fifth. But then sooner or later, the adrenaline is no longer the key. Right. To push you through with your strength Right. Becomes more of like technique or something else, right? Mm-hmm. You start getting used to it, right? So I think adrenaline is there up to a point, right? But in the, in the life of death situation, I think, uh, your mind could definitely take you to a place where can definitely push as much as possible, right?

[00:11:01] Eldar: To the brink of death. What, let's just say of your body dying, 

[00:11:04] Harris: the crazy part is 

[00:11:06] Eldar: done 

[00:11:06] Harris: when they go through that shit. Mm-hmm. They go on, they, they carry with what they learned through that mindset mm-hmm. Onto their civilian life. Correct. They'll climb certain shit that seems mm-hmm. That's rarely ever been able to climb.

[00:11:22] Harris: That's right. So, I mean, I keep reading, I want to go into New York City one of these days 'cause they do like, uh, this Seal Memorial thing or whatever 

[00:11:30] Toliy: Okay. 

[00:11:31] Harris: Or something for nine 11 where a whole bunch of seals gather. Uh. Starting, I believe in Manhattan and they swim across the entire Hudson into New Jersey.

[00:11:42] Harris: Sick and all this shit sick. Do pull up on halfway and let, let us know when that is. We'll go there. Yeah. That's awesome. I'm not gonna participate, but you can watch, we watch. You can watch, watch. It's crazy. Let's do it. But they're doing this, they swim the entire Hudson from New York all the way to New Jersey.

[00:11:54] Harris: Wow. Uh, stop along the way. Do like 20 fucking pull-ups each time and fucking insane. Sick. So 

[00:12:01] Eldar: you're 

[00:12:01] Harris: attracted to that. It's insane to see what people can fucking do. Yeah. I can't even swim a fucking lap without being, you know. Sure, 

[00:12:09] Eldar: sure. But nonetheless, you have examples of your own perseverance in your life.

[00:12:12] Eldar: Yeah, yeah. Right. Nothing compared 

[00:12:15] Harris: to what the hell you guys are talking about. But yeah. 

[00:12:16] Eldar: Hey, hey, listen, everyone's, I think everyone is in their own level of perseverance, which is, nothing's wrong with that, you know what I mean? You know, um, I think in finding your levels and then maybe pushing them a little bit, especially in the areas where you can, um.

[00:12:31] Eldar: Develop your character. I think it's a big one. And I think Mike's example, at least, right? Mm-hmm. For a very long time, he said, Hey, I was never competitive. I was always shying away from losing. And I, I didn't like losing, I didn't like the way it felt, you know? So I shied away from competition because it made me feel bad, you know?

[00:12:46] Eldar: Where now rock climbing is a very interesting sport, very interesting sport, because I'm used to a sport where I'm, I have an enemy, right? The, the opposing team right here, there is no opposing team. The opposing 

[00:12:58] Harris: team is yourself. 

[00:12:59] Eldar: Yeah, exactly. Mm-hmm. Right? Yeah. There is a, there's a trail and it's created in such a way where some people can do it, some people can't do it, you know what I mean?

[00:13:08] Eldar: And it's like, it's me versus the trail, or it's me versus myself, right? So the feelings that you get in that moment, and I think that Mike and mm-hmm. Talk about these feelings are very interesting. Yeah. You know what I mean? Whatever. 'cause it's still, it's very humbling. Yeah. 

[00:13:22] Harris: Whatever members is making you able to, in your mind say, you know, fucking keep going.

[00:13:28] Harris: Keep going. Yeah. Somehow. I wish there was a way we could, I don't know, tap into it, find out what it is, and tap into it That I think think that's, this is what we're trying to do. That's, I'm trying to find out 

[00:13:40] Mike: because yeah, at first, yeah, I was like, I don't, I wasn't upset with myself or anything. I was like, you know, I wa I didn't wanna give up or not climb the trail anymore.

[00:13:50] Mike: Like I wasn't upset about it. I wasn't frustrated. I was like, Hmm. More so like an unknown state. 'cause I was like, wait, this is weird. What's happening here? 

[00:14:00] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:14:00] Mike: It didn't make any sense. But then as I spoke to Tolli about it, 

[00:14:03] Toliy: yeah. 

[00:14:03] Mike: I actually felt good about it. Yeah. Because I understood that I can do more and I can tap into more if I, and again, not just in the rock climbing, but I think in life, you know?

[00:14:13] Mike: Mm-hmm. A lot of times, um, a lot like a couple conversations that I had with cause 

[00:14:19] Toliy: mm-hmm. 

[00:14:20] Mike: And I think I mentioned before, I always say like, in sport or, uh. A lot of things in sport or in a game. It's a lot of stuff resembles like real life because you're cha you're faced with so many psychological things.

[00:14:34] Mike: Yeah. 100%. You know? So 100%. Um, 

[00:14:39] Eldar: I think that that's why there's a correlation between people that like competition or whatever, and sports. Mm-hmm. For example, going to professions like sales. Mm-hmm. Because in sales kind of is also inherently has a level of competition. Mm-hmm. Right? 

[00:14:52] Mike: Yeah. 

[00:14:52] Eldar: Uh, beat your goal, beat somebody else's goal.

[00:14:54] Eldar: Yeah. Beat the team's goal and stuff, so. Mm-hmm. Um, interesting. It is interesting how those things do translate in real life. Mm-hmm. Right? And, and show your character Yeah. In those types of things. Yeah. So, 

[00:15:04] Harris: I, I have a question. Yeah. Is there a possible that this has, this can be, uh, how do I put it in words?

[00:15:13] Harris: Uh, is it possible this can, can be connected to like mental, uh. There's certain mental strategies, right? Yeah. Certain mental ways, right? 

[00:15:25] Harris: Yeah. 

[00:15:25] Harris: Uh, like is there possible that you could do certain mental activities that, uh, expand or test your mental 100%. Mm-hmm. Because when Yeah. Right. When I listen to the podcast Yeah.

[00:15:39] Harris: They talk about, you know, people always ask them like, how did you, how are you able to do these things? 

[00:15:44] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:15:44] Harris: And they're saying, you know, our training set us up for this type of shit. 100%. You know, they, they break you mentally. Yeah. They, they make you push forward that you don't believe you can. Mm-hmm.

[00:15:54] Harris: Like I was listening to a Buds guy when they fucking pushed him into the pool and they were explaining how someone actually fucking died. That's right. Fucking trying to do this. Yeah. And they brought him back to life. Yeah. And the first thing he asked was, did I pass? 

[00:16:06] Eldar: Yeah. 

[00:16:06] Harris: Like, what the fuck? That's all 

[00:16:08] Eldar: he 

[00:16:08] Harris: cared about, right?

[00:16:09] Harris: Yeah. And he goes, you fucking passed, dude. Yeah. You fucking died. Yeah, dude, you didn't give a fuck. Yeah. Yeah. And you, is there a way for all of us to. Challenge ourself mentally in order to persevere 

[00:16:19] Eldar: 100%. And I think that despite the fact that you might not be, you might not be linking this, these types of exercises with your everyday life, but for example, remember when you and to were doing, uh, call reviews during sales.

[00:16:33] Eldar: I don't see how that's really See, you don't see it. I don't see it. But this is exactly what it is. Right? How is that? Well, I'm ex I'm gonna tie my mentally, I'm gonna ex I'm gonna explain this to you as he breaks you right through that call. Right. He challenges your understanding and beliefs. Mm-hmm. He breaks you, he chops you down every single time because you're doing everything wrong.

[00:16:54] Eldar: Right. And long enough. If you can sit through that kind of criticism right, and really embrace it, guess what? The actual phone calls they become easy. That is why those people, the, the seals talk about training so much because during training, they literally kill him or kill them. Right. So when the death quote unquote, um, scenarios do come their way, it becomes almost like second nature.

[00:17:23] Eldar: Like, uh, okay, I've done, I've been there before. I've been here before I can fucking get through this care. Exactly. Right. Um, obviously there's the seals are special people Yeah. When it comes to their specific job. Mm-hmm. Right. But I think in sales for you, alright. It's the same thing. So if we can break you mm-hmm.

[00:17:40] Eldar: As much as possible and rebuild you. Right. That is your, that is us training and helping you with the mental forge. I know. I gotta 

[00:17:47] Harris: get to the, to the point where it's like, I don't give a fuck what happens. Correct. It's not 

[00:17:52] Eldar: that, it's not that you don't give a fuck on what happens. You still have caring.

[00:17:56] Eldar: Yeah. But 

[00:17:56] Harris: it's more like you experienced it, you can break through. That's right. You know, it's kind of like, uh, 

[00:18:01] Eldar: even like when adversity happens and is being thrown at you because you've persevered it so much with us, you have the answers in your mind. So your mind naturally opens up and says. Oh, I know the answer to this.

[00:18:13] Eldar: Yeah. Oh, I know the answer to this. It becomes a natural almost. So I need my own drown proofing 100%. And I think that's what we do here, that's what we're trying to do with you. I haven't 

[00:18:23] Harris: connected dots 

[00:18:24] Eldar: on that, but do you see that? That they do connect? Uh, I don't know. You hate them, right? You hate those calls.

[00:18:32] Eldar: I hate them. Why? Because they feel a certain type of way. 

[00:18:35] Harris: Yeah. But that's like saying, uh, you know, seals always said, oh, I hate the water, but I fucking got used to it. I just didn't give a shit. 

[00:18:41] Eldar: That's it. That's exactly what we're talking about, that mm-hmm. When you get on the phone call with that person, you're no longer trembling, you're no longer scared because Totally.

[00:18:49] Eldar: And me Right. Provide a lot bigger challenge than any of them would. The 

[00:18:54] Harris: question I have is, right. Yeah. If, why hasn't it fucking kicked? Why hasn't it worked? Why hasn't it, what hasn't worked? Um, the mental strategy. Why hasn't it? Well, why haven't I broke? Why haven't I just gotten the point? Well, there's a, there's a 

[00:19:12] Eldar: two, there's a couple of things here that's working here.

[00:19:13] Eldar: Number one, how do you know that it's not working? That's number one. Number. '

[00:19:17] Harris: cause I haven't gotten to the point where I, I let go of, uh, yeah, like fear. I totally used to say, I haven't gotten to the point where, you know, where he, he goes like, I don't care how this call is gonna go, because guess what? It's gonna be another one.

[00:19:31] Harris: I haven't gotten to that point. 

[00:19:33] Eldar: Yeah. Okay, fine. If that's the measure of success, then if you didn't get there, then we have to ask the questions as that. Have you even thought that this is what's, how it's connected and this is what you should be doing, and are you doing the actual training that the seals are doing in order to be comfortable with the water?

[00:19:48] Eldar: Right. For a very long time, you resisted the type of training you always said, oh, I'm still like that. Well, that's what I'm saying, right? So if you don't put yourself in the fire. You're not gonna get comfortable with the fire. So how do I 

[00:20:00] Harris: just get comfortable with listening to the call because I'm 

[00:20:03] Eldar: not comfortable.

[00:20:03] Eldar: That's a very, that's very good question. And I think totally always told you like, Hey, you don't yet have that curiosity where you come to us and say, Hey guys, I think I fucked up here. I wanna find out. Yeah, but tell me this. Tell me that. I'd like to find out here, here, here. You're not a curious George yet.

[00:20:17] Eldar: I've been doing this for 

[00:20:17] Harris: so long. When am I gonna get the doing what? Fucking well, I've been doing the job, right? Almost 

[00:20:24] Eldar: a year now. No, people do jobs for 10, 20, 30 years and then never get anywhere, Paris. 

[00:20:30] Harris: Well, how do I kick it up a notch? How do I fucking give myself a not drip nitrous oxide boost? 

[00:20:37] Eldar: Well, first of all, by asking this question, second of all, taking the feedback and answers that we give you, and then implementing those, those things by being a curious George as to actually find out how to do it.

[00:20:49] Eldar: And when you do do it, and when you have that breakthrough, you can climb more. 

[00:20:52] Harris: Like I, I was doing the call today. Okay. Okay. With that guy that said he, he rarely checks his mailbox like once, once a month. Uhhuh like, I, I fucking challenged him. Yeah. I'm like, you're telling me you don't check your mailbox?

[00:21:10] Harris: Mm-hmm. You check your mailbox once a month is what you're telling me. Yeah. He goes, yeah, all my bills are online. And my, my first instincts was, well, what happens if the town sent you something in the mail? Mm-hmm. And you don't respond to it. 

[00:21:23] Mike: Yeah. You know, I think, um, maybe not sure if he, he's describing, but to what I thought about my situation was the fear of failure.

[00:21:33] Eldar: Wanna allow you to succeed. How about this? That's good that you said that because I was earlier thinking, how about the fear of succeeding? Right. And feeling all those feelings Right. Of success. Um, I. And self-sabotaging yourself, uh, prematurely. How about that one? The one thing 

[00:21:53] Harris: I can say about that call mm-hmm.

[00:21:55] Harris: Is I knew I the guy was not qualified was what? I'm sorry. 

[00:21:59] Eldar: And I have plenty of examples of Harris where he self-sabotaged himself, right? Prematurely. And now totally. Like, for example, picks up the phone call and in the one hand, boom, gets it done. You know what I mean? Has a good conversation, schedules a meeting, books a client, right?

[00:22:12] Eldar: And he's like, what the fuck? Well, there's a reason for that. There's a closed mind that is approaching the situation, and then there's an open mind that's approaching the situation, right? And the open mind allows, number one, for any type of scenario to happen. That's number one, allows it to any scenario to happen.

[00:22:29] Eldar: He closed mind does not allow to any scenario to happen in the first place. Number two, a resilient mind or an educated mind has the ability to sway the outcome with his best ability. Does not mean he always will. Okay? But within that timeframe, he has the ability to say things, do things in order to, uh, change the trajectory of the outcome.

[00:22:54] Eldar: So there's a couple of things that are missing in his thing that he has, and that's why those things play out the way they do. And I think one of them is the self-sabotage about not succeeding in the first place. And that's a very interesting topic, 

[00:23:05] Harris: Uhhuh. So going back to the call Yeah. I knew I didn't get the guy Yeah.

[00:23:09] Harris: But I was still kind of proud of myself. Right. Okay. Because I did hit him with objections. I did. Mm-hmm. Try my best to Yeah. To counter it and really get him to think you had fun. I had fun and I got off the call and I wasn't feeling like a shitty, you know, like a, yeah. Fuck. You know? 

[00:23:23] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:23:24] Harris: I, I was kind of a little happy with it.

[00:23:27] Toliy: Okay. 

[00:23:28] Harris: I, I knew I didn't get him, but yeah, I just let it go. And, uh, 'cause I did throw, I'm sure the car, the call wasn't perfect. 

[00:23:34] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:23:35] Harris: But I did throw objections and I did reiterate what he says, like you're telling me. You only check your mailbox once a month? Well, yeah. All my bills are online. I was like, okay.

[00:23:45] Harris: And I'm thinking to myself, this, this has gotta be fucking bullshit, Uhhuh. But, uh, he, he's just trying to, trying to get a price down or something, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You hear what you're saying, you know? 

[00:23:56] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:23:56] Harris: But I didn't get the guy, but I was still kind of proud of myself because, uh, I didn't think twice about what I was gonna say.

[00:24:03] Harris: Okay. You went with it. I just spit it out. Like you're telling me you only check your mailbox once a month? Mm-hmm. Because I, I said to him, I jumped into it. I was like, if you got a handwritten card in the mail, you're telling me you won't open it. He goes, well, I don't check my mailbox at all every day.

[00:24:16] Harris: Mm-hmm. You know, like I check it once a month. And I was like, okay. He goes, uh, you know a lot of people do that 'cause everything's online now and all this shit. I was like,

[00:24:27] Harris: I was like, okay, I see. Alright, 

[00:24:28] Eldar: so see you, see you got like, you got stuck? No, I didn't get stuck. Stuck. I 

[00:24:32] Harris: said, I said, so I said, you didn't say it. No, I didn't. Don't make this up. Don't I'm fucking lie to you now. I'm fucking paying attention. Listen. All, all right. I, I said to the guy and I said, you know, is that everybody, he goes, you know, $3 a lot.

[00:24:45] Harris: He goes, I know mail is like not a good, you know, it's not, it's the least answered to. Mm-hmm. And I'm thinking to myself, okay, I, I said, okay. At this point, I'm like, all right, this guy's not gonna be qualified. You know, 

[00:24:57] Eldar: you didn't have anything clever else to say. 

[00:24:58] Harris: No. And I wasn't gonna try to reel this guy in 'cause it sounded like this guy had his mind made up.

[00:25:03] Harris: Well, look. And he's like, listen, if I get your, your sample in the mail and it stands out, and I'm thinking to myself, are you really gonna look out for that sample? 

[00:25:11] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:25:12] Harris: Or are you gonna check your mailbox a month later and, Hey, here it is. Yeah. Yeah. 

[00:25:16] Eldar: So it sounds like you are extracting some good stuff out of one rebuttal.

[00:25:20] Eldar: Yeah. A clever rebuttal that you're having. But as the conversation goes on, if it seems like it kind of falls off a little bit. Well, 

[00:25:27] Harris: to the point where, so that's, 

[00:25:28] Eldar: that's perseverance. I 

[00:25:30] Harris: got the sense that this guy was not gonna buy, 

[00:25:33] Eldar: uh, sure. You did not present enough evidence or enough clever rebuttals because he was asking about it in order to spark his mind so he can buy.

[00:25:43] Eldar: He was asking about, did you hear what I fucking said? 

[00:25:45] Harris: I did. What did I say? I did not spark his mind enough. Okay. 

[00:25:49] Eldar: So you see the difference between what I said and what you said? Yeah. 

[00:25:52] Harris: Okay. 

[00:25:53] Eldar: But 

[00:25:54] Harris: the one 

[00:25:54] Eldar: thing you drowned. 

[00:25:55] Harris: Oh yeah, you died. Well, I wouldn't say I died. You died. I might have tapped out. Okay, fine.

[00:26:00] Harris: Same. I tapped out of the water. Okay. Yeah. I came up in the seal training and there you go. Up for air. Okay. But, you know, uh, to the point where he is like, what's your open rate? I said, you know, I said, well, we don't actually know our open rate. We know is we do have continued. 

[00:26:17] Eldar: No, no, no. Well that's the thing.

[00:26:19] Eldar: Why did you go into the explaining something else where you, you have to explain why the open rate cannot, cannot be tracked. 

[00:26:29] Harris: Why? I explained it. I said, I told him we have no way of tracking it. 

[00:26:32] Eldar: Okay, good. You just, did he understand this point? 

[00:26:34] Harris: He's like, yeah. And I was like, but we do have customers that stick with us, so it's obviously gotta be doing something for him.

[00:26:40] Harris: Okay. It 

[00:26:40] Eldar: is important not to roll through the customer's part. Mm-hmm. You first have to make sure that he acknowledges and understands the point of the fact that there's impossible for us to try open. I said, said, unless you're sitting there waiting for the mail piece. Yeah. Mail to arrive. I told him, and you watch him, there was, I told each, each individual, watch them.

[00:26:58] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Right. Open the stuff. 

[00:27:00] Harris: I told him there was no way to track it. 

[00:27:02] Eldar: Okay. 

[00:27:02] Harris: I said there was no way to track it. Mm-hmm. So there's no way for us to know the open rate. Mm-hmm. But I, what I will say is we have customers that stick with us. Mm-hmm. So obviously it must be doing something for them. Lame, but fine.

[00:27:15] Harris: What? I got the point across and he goes, well, let me see the sample, and if it pops to me, it stands out to me. Okay. 

[00:27:21] Eldar: Then we can go from there. Do you believe that? Do you believe me that these are weak points? I'm trying. You are, but you didn't answer my question. I mean, weak points, you know, 

[00:27:36] Harris: there, there's, he's the man, right?

[00:27:39] Harris: You said nothing. Yeah. Fuck you. Fuck you, man. Fuck you. You literally said nothing. Fuck you. But you know what? I have that, okay. You understand that 

[00:27:46] Eldar: You're, you're, we're going to war. Okay? Me, you and totally. Okay. Sales war. Okay. Uhhuh. Okay. You carrying a pocket knife. What the fuck, man? I thought you were 

[00:28:01] Toliy: gonna say a purple dildo.

[00:28:03] Toliy: A purple dildo. Yeah. And you think that it's a knife. Yeah. 

[00:28:06] Eldar: You understand? And we carrying bazookas, it's a very different, maybe I'm carrying the AKA. It totally is carrying a bazooka. This is what's happening. 

[00:28:13] Harris: I might, you don't believe this. I might be able to turn that pocket knife in a goddamn bazooka.

[00:28:17] Harris: One damn motherfucker. If you 

[00:28:18] Eldar: sharp it, if you sharpen it long enough, you can turn it into a purple ddo. Fuck you, man. And then every time, every time you lose a sales goal, you can just fuck yourself. You know what I mean? What 

[00:28:27] Harris: is wrong 

[00:28:28] Eldar: with you? Listen, I'm trying to improve, man. Good. But as long as you understand your 

[00:28:37] Toliy: level, what, what does it mean to try?

[00:28:41] Toliy: I'm still here. 

[00:28:42] Eldar: Aren. I motherfucker, he's persevering, isn't he?

[00:28:48] Eldar: I think when the questions stop is when you're done, you stop persevering. You just roll and die and then just you roll over and die. Right? And then that will be felt. You know that that'll always is felt. We've seen previous people that came through this door tried and then they had no more questions.

[00:29:07] Eldar: It dies and that's it. Right? So there's no real progress. All right. Yeah. And the case of, I mean, to Harris' example, Mike's example with climbing, there's still questions like, how the fuck do I do this? Like, what is happening here? What is going on? Why do I have a mental block? Why do I have a physical block?

[00:29:27] Eldar: Why do I have this? That's why they are still 

[00:29:29] Eldar: trying. So yes, they're trying.

[00:29:36] Eldar: And I don't think that's, that's not a, that's a very good thing. 

[00:29:38] Harris: The moment I stopped coming out and as telling elder, Hey, I got a quote. Come on, we got a quote. Yeah, you could fire my. 

[00:29:47] Toliy: Fine. I mean, that's like the basics of like having a job. Yeah. 

[00:29:51] Harris: Yeah. The moment Elgar feels or you feel No, we're, we're 

[00:29:54] Eldar: the judges of the moment.

[00:29:55] Eldar: Well, I'm just moment. No, no, no. I'm telling you, we're the judges of the moment. The moment you trying, you still feel 

[00:30:00] Harris: like I'm not, it feels like I'm not trying anymore. If fucking kick my ass out though. 

[00:30:05] Eldar: Yeah. Yeah. Look, well, no, the mood changes drastically, and it's a black and white thing, and we can read it right away.

[00:30:12] Harris: Trust me. I'm trying to chase that adrenaline rush. You got a little half trouble when you close that deal. Once I got a half job every, every time I close it, I got a big smile on my face. My fucking loved it, you know? Yeah. Mm. Listen. 

[00:30:27] Eldar: I think you are natural, but you're just not there yet and you need to get to a point where you become, you're 

[00:30:32] Harris: seeing, you might be seeing something.

[00:30:32] Harris: I don't see. 

[00:30:33] Eldar: Yeah, I do. I do. I actually do. Because of the fact that you even have a testimony of that you watch these guys persevere. You know? Right now it's a military base because you an idiot, 

[00:30:43] Harris: but what do you mean? No, I like listening to it because, yeah. Well, the stories don't seem. Possible. But that tell Yeah, 

[00:30:51] Eldar: but that's what, it's the miracles that you are like, what I'm saying is that the reason why I'm sorry, calling you an idiot is that you are attracted to the miracles, to the, like the old, I don't think they're miracles.

[00:31:00] Eldar: Well, I think that you experiencing like a miracle thing. I. Like the feeling of like, it's inspirational 

[00:31:06] Mike: to see those guys. Yes. And that's what you're 

[00:31:07] Eldar: looking 

[00:31:08] Harris: for. 'cause Yeah, I'm looking for it because, you know, like, like that you, you under that impression, if these guys are able to fucking do this mm-hmm.

[00:31:14] Harris: Why can't I do this if these guys are able to get through this thing? I'm gonna tell you 

[00:31:17] Eldar: right now that these guys are not consciously doing it in such a way where they're like, yeah, I calculate it and that's exactly how I'm gonna respond. But they have have to use their fucking 

[00:31:25] Harris: mind. And what, what's gonna be my next move here?

[00:31:28] Harris: What should I do? 

[00:31:28] Eldar: No, Harris, no, no, no. They actually don't what you're looking for. They, they have 

[00:31:33] Mike: instinct. What you're looking for. It's fake news. It's, I would call it probably inspiration by like association. 'cause you watch that clip and you know how many people watch movies and they get inspired and then all of a sudden they wanna change something.

[00:31:44] Mike: The next day they start exercising dieting. Like, I listen 

[00:31:46] Harris: to David Goggins too, fake news. And he's like, what do you mean bro? And he's like, it's mental. Everything in your life is mental. It's a Mel dope challenge. How do I break through this challenge? 

[00:31:55] Eldar: Yeah. I think David Gong is very lazy when it comes to explaining what's actually happening.

[00:31:59] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Right? So he pushes through physically in order to prove his point. But I think he's getting a lot of things wrong. But we could talk about David goin on some on day. I actually can go, he, if he comes to me and says, Hey Elder, I wanna do your training. If he goes through my training, he's not gonna be able to last.

[00:32:17] Harris: But he got one thing right? Everything in life is mental. It's a mental game. 

[00:32:22] Eldar: Okay, fine. That's a very general statement. No, you don't believe this. We need to breathe air. Can you explain that? 

[00:32:27] Harris: We 

[00:32:27] Eldar: need to breathe the air. Okay. We breathe the air. What? Like what? Everything. 

[00:32:31] Harris: Life is a mental game. You just have to figure out a way to break through.

[00:32:35] Eldar: See, I disagree with that because it's not a breaking part. That, that, that, that gets us to a good place. Not breaking. We'd have to break something through, break through, break through. We have 

[00:32:44] Harris: to break through the block. You know what I mean? 

[00:32:46] Eldar: No, I think we need to understand what it is. I, the faster we understand what's actually going on in reality of things, the faster we get there and we understand what, what actually needs to be done in order for us to be happy also.

[00:32:57] Eldar: Yeah. But 

[00:32:57] Toliy: like also, I don't think it's a breakthrough also like saying, saying that line, like what, what is it like accomplish for somebody? Like Yeah, okay. You have 

[00:33:04] Harris: to identify what the problem is and break. Tear it down. 

[00:33:07] Eldar: Yeah. But that's not enough, Harris. Because if I keep telling you like, Harris, you have these problems, please break through.

[00:33:12] Eldar: What the fuck are you gonna do? You're gonna say, okay, David, go, maybe I need through this with me. Maybe do 

[00:33:16] Harris: shit. Maybe I need to go back to Ringwood and meditate, man. Maybe you do and do what that used to be your thing, man, it still 

[00:33:25] Eldar: is my thing. I'm still in Ringwood. What does that mean though? Like, 

[00:33:29] Harris: like I could never clear my mind and just 

[00:33:32] Eldar: And what is that gonna do for you?

[00:33:37] Eldar: I don't know. 

[00:33:39] Harris: I'm desperate. 

[00:33:40] Eldar: Paris. It's a, it's, uh, it, it becomes, I think for you, right? Or at least what we're trying to do, right? We're trying to strip away and put time on our hands in order to figure out what is it actually you want. The faster we figure out what is it actually you want, the faster you'll get to the place that where you belong.

[00:33:58] Eldar: That's all that is. 

[00:34:00] Toliy: No, but like what you, you said that you're desperate. 

[00:34:03] Harris: Well, I'm trying to finally get,

[00:34:11] Harris: I'm trying to get to a place in my life. Why did you 

[00:34:13] Eldar: yawn like that? Like why did you say like that you think? 

[00:34:15] Harris: I don't know. Uh, frustration was 

[00:34:17] Eldar: it? Okay. 

[00:34:20] Harris: I'm trying to get to a place in my life that I'm happy with. Okay. 

[00:34:25] Eldar: Uh, yeah. Okay. So what, what is the difference between desiring and wanting and trying?

[00:34:39] Eldar: I'm gonna keep 

[00:34:39] Harris: trying until I get to it. I don't know. 

[00:34:42] Toliy: No, but what, what is the difference between someone who's trying and someone who's wanting or desiring 

[00:34:48] Harris: wanting is one thing. Trying is, uh, trying to make an effort to get there, I think. 

[00:34:54] Toliy: Okay. So are you doing more trying or wanting 

[00:34:58] Harris: a, A little bit of both maybe.

[00:35:00] Harris: Okay. Okay. Is this fair? 

[00:35:02] Toliy: Yeah. Like, I feel like, like you're probably the opposite from desperate. 

[00:35:07] Harris: What do you mean? 

[00:35:08] Toliy: Like, because you said I'm desperate, like a desperate person is willing to do like whatever, whatever it takes one, A desperate person is like. An extremely hard worker, probably. Right, 

[00:35:20] Mike: but is it, is it, um, is it subjective?

[00:35:23] Mike: Your understanding of desperate and his understanding of desperate? Mm-hmm. Yes. He may, he may feel he's 

[00:35:28] Toliy: giving it all. 

[00:35:28] Eldar: Start with the defining you, 

[00:35:29] Toliy: asking the definition. Uh, yeah. Yeah. I agree with that. You're gonna go back to, to define asking questions 

[00:35:35] Harris: and all this shit, but I'm not at that point where

[00:35:41] Harris: I don't want to, uh, I'm not gonna say box yourself in, box myself in, or give my given in. Mm-hmm. Or gi, I feel like, uh, I don't wanna, why, why? I feel like I'm gonna get on my knees and be like, Hey, why I'm dying. Why? Like, help me. What, why? 

[00:36:00] Eldar: I don't know. Uh,

[00:36:09] Eldar: I don't know. I, I, is that what's gonna require. 

[00:36:13] Harris: I get on my knees. Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You guys, 

[00:36:15] Eldar: we can expedite the process. We just have to, I don't, we have to just see whose balls are the smallest so you can swallow. You know what I mean? Definitely doesn't look 

[00:36:25] Harris: right. The 

[00:36:26] Eldar: fuck, man, you 

[00:36:27] Harris: sick. Fuck. But I don't know, man.

[00:36:33] Harris: Eh, I have a hard time asking for help. I have a hard time, I guess accepting help. Uhhuh. Uh, 

[00:36:43] Eldar: why isn't all the things like asking for help, getting help, good things 

[00:36:50] Harris: haven't always been man in your previous relationships? 

[00:36:54] Eldar: Yes. Okay. Even is this a different one? 

[00:36:58] Harris: Yes, it is. Which is a crazy, crazy mind fuck, right?

[00:37:01] Harris: I'm trying. It is, but I'm still trying to break through Yeah. Certain things because we're, when I asked for help Yeah. In my previous life, Uhhuh, uh. It's interesting. It always interest 

[00:37:12] Eldar: the words. Right. That's very interesting. 

[00:37:14] Harris: It's weird saying it too. Uhhuh in my previous life, Uhhuh, uh, it always came with either lectures or Yeah.

[00:37:22] Harris: You know, this is the last time, you know, I'm gonna give you this, or I'm gonna help you with this. Yeah. You know, you better have a next steps or next plans. You know, it was always like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't keep doing this. 

[00:37:35] Eldar: Yeah. Enough was enough. Yeah. I get it. You know, like there's a crazy mind Fuck that you landed here, right?

[00:37:42] Eldar: Yeah. 

[00:37:43] Harris: Huh. Even with my dad, bro, it's like, I can't keep doing this. This is the last time, you know? Yeah. You know, what are you gonna learn? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You gotta be fucking kidding me, Harris, you know? Mm-hmm. It wasn't even just like. It's okay. You know, like, just think about it. Right? Like, dad, I got myself into a predicament.

[00:38:03] Harris: Yeah. Here we go again. Yeah. You know, when are you gonna fucking learn? You know this, this is always doing this shit. Yeah. It's not like he tries to help me. He, he, I don't wanna say, breaks me down. 

[00:38:16] Harris: Yeah. 

[00:38:17] Harris: You know, that's what I was dealing with, even with my parents. Yeah. It was break you down. It's not really trying to help you solve the problem, it's more like making you feel like shit.

[00:38:29] Eldar: Mm. And that's it. That's the end goal.

[00:38:35] Harris: I don't know, like whenever I asked my dad for help, it was more like he'd break me down and he wouldn't help me solve the problem. He just kind of give me what I needed and not try to help me solve. Sho it in your face. Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly right. But that's, and he'd always go after, at the end of it.

[00:38:55] Harris: Uh, don't feel, you know, a couple days later, don't feel afraid to ask me for help, like mm-hmm. I'm scarred from, I guess past. 

[00:39:04] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:39:05] Harris: I don't like asking for help. 

[00:39:07] Toliy: Yeah. '

[00:39:07] Harris: cause it always comes with a lecture. And whenever I always came back and asked for help from him, 

[00:39:12] Toliy: yeah. 

[00:39:13] Harris: I would always have like a pit. 

[00:39:14] Toliy: Yeah.

[00:39:15] Harris: In my stomach. Yeah. Like, I know it's coming. There you go. I know. I'm gonna get the, the lecture. Yeah. Without the lube. Oh, shit. Well, I had a pit in my stomach. Like it's, I hated doing it. 

[00:39:28] Harris: Yeah. 

[00:39:28] Harris: Worried feeling. You know, like, that's why I get, like when we listen to the call reviews, I get all nervous because every time I.

[00:39:39] Eldar: But do you understand that the way we're carrying ourselves? Yes. But 

[00:39:42] Harris: it's hard to break because for the past 

[00:39:44] Eldar: 20 years, do you understand that we're trying to break that thing? 

[00:39:47] Harris: Yeah. But for the past you do understand this. Yeah, I do. I do. Do you understand that? It's still 

[00:39:51] Eldar: hard for me to Do you understand that success lies at the, on the other side of that?

[00:39:56] Eldar: I do. You do? But it's hard for me to listen because, is it on you or is it on us? 

[00:40:02] Harris: I don't know. On both of us. 

[00:40:04] Eldar: How, 

[00:40:04] Harris: I don't 

[00:40:05] Eldar: know. Are we doing right by you? 

[00:40:06] Harris: Yeah. 

[00:40:06] Eldar: Okay. Are you doing doing right by yourself? 

[00:40:09] Harris: No. Okay. 

[00:40:10] Eldar: So who's it on? 

[00:40:10] Harris: Me. Okay. But it's hard for me to get past that point because 20 years, every time I ask for help and all this shit, uh, I still have Do you that, that even sitting in on the call reviews, I still have the pit in my stomach.

[00:40:22] Harris: I still take the hit of the vape. Yeah. 'cause uh, I'm still waiting for the Yeah, the punch, the, the hammer to drop. 

[00:40:28] Eldar: Yeah. 

[00:40:29] Harris: Yeah. Because that's what I'm used to. 

[00:40:32] Eldar: That's the thing. That's the difference between maybe the outside world or whatever the world that you experienced. Right. Who maybe used the word help Right.

[00:40:44] Eldar: To just hit you over the head. Right. Versus what we're trying to do here. You 

[00:40:49] Harris: know, because it was always like, you know, I tell my dad I'm having a hard time, I can't pay the bills or anything like this. He wouldn't help me solve the problem. Mm-hmm. He'd be like, oh man, I can't keep doing this. Mm-hmm. Like, you know, yeah.

[00:41:05] Harris: Uh, all this shit. And he'd, I don't wanna say degrade me. 

[00:41:12] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:41:13] Harris: But it was kind of like this, you know, always be, you're killing me. Mm-hmm. Uh, all this shit. Yeah. Like, I, you know, you just asked for this, you just asked for that. I was like, dad, I'm having a hard time here. I can't find a way out. 

[00:41:25] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:41:25] Harris: And you know, I used to go to the point where.

[00:41:29] Harris: I would, you're gonna find this hard to believe, but I didn't want, don't be gay. I didn't want to ask my dad for money. 

[00:41:35] Eldar: Okay. 

[00:41:35] Harris: So, so you went to sell your body? No. Oh. I go three days without eating. Oh. I, you know, then I called my, my dad. This is why 

[00:41:43] Eldar: you, you became so skinny. Yeah. Oh, 

[00:41:45] Harris: wow. Mm-hmm. I, I called my dad three days later and I'm like, dad, I really need money.

[00:41:49] Harris: I haven't eaten in three days. And of course they'll go, why didn't you call? Why do you fuck? Do you think I didn't call? 

[00:41:54] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:41:54] Harris: Because every time I call and ask for help, I am getting the, oh, you're killing me. You, you know, I can't keep doing this. Like, why the fuck do you Yeah. But when it comes to food, it always comes to food.

[00:42:06] Harris: Dad, I'm trying to survive. I'm trying to, 

[00:42:08] Toliy: yeah. 

[00:42:08] Harris: Live. I ended up going to move in with my mom in Jacksonville. That's how it started. Mm-hmm. And my mom looked at me and she goes, oh my God, dude, I was getting bones. 

[00:42:19] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:42:20] Harris: Because I was starving myself. 

[00:42:21] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:42:23] Harris: I was eating one day and then I'd fast for three days and then she goes, you're starving yourself.

[00:42:28] Harris: Why? I say, I can't afford to fucking live. I'm paying rent. Yeah. At the time on a social security check, that's $800. Mm-hmm. My rent was 500. 

[00:42:38] Eldar: Yeah. So you're chilling right now? 

[00:42:41] Harris: I'm trying. No. Are you chilling right now or no? Yeah. But for some reason you live in a good life. I am. Alright. But for some reason, still in the back of my head, listen, I, I feel like I'm gonna have the hammer drop because every job I had mm-hmm.

[00:42:51] Harris: The hammer dropped. Covid hit. Yeah. I fucking lost my job. 

[00:42:55] Eldar: Okay. This is the tie back to you. 

[00:42:57] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:42:58] Eldar: The hammer drop is the fact that you don't allow yourself to succeed. And some of this stuff and some of the blocks, right. And some of the blocks that we have, the personal blocks, I think is, is, is rooted in that and self-sabotage.

[00:43:12] Harris: Mm. See that's the problem though. Every job I had, eventually there was a hammer that dropped. Yeah. Can you explain it more? I don't 

[00:43:18] Eldar: get it. I think this thing right here, what he's describing, the fact that we are always almost anticipating failure mm-hmm. Is we don't give a full effort. We, number one, we don't give a full effort.

[00:43:33] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Okay. Right. Be because of that. Mm-hmm. We don't give a full effort. Mm-hmm. Right. So we need to make it where it's like I told you so see, I'm not supposed to succeed. Oh, I'm not supposed to. I was thinking about 

[00:43:47] Mike: like, uh, 

[00:43:47] Eldar: yeah. Where it's like, like that's why you were surprised that you were like, wait a second, I do have more in me.

[00:43:53] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Like, what the fuck? Mm-hmm. Where did that come from? Mm-hmm. Well, it's because it's defeating mindset that you've been having for a very long time about. Losing about winning, about competition. Mm-hmm. And all this other stuff, judgment of self. It's this thing right here mm-hmm. Where it's like you don't even know your own capabilities or your own abilities.

[00:44:11] Eldar: Yeah, yeah. Where I'm looking at you, I'm like, yo, this motherfucker is strong as fuck. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? Like why are, you said it amount of times, but I, I said it, I'm like, yo, what the fuck? Yeah. I don't agree with you. Yeah. You don't agree with me. I don't agree with you because you don't agree with yourself.

[00:44:23] Eldar: See, yeah. And that's why a lot of times that that's the disparity where I'm pushing for the best of you in that moment. Mm-hmm. But we don't have, we have an argument or the girls, right? Mm-hmm. Same shit. Yeah. Like, I'm like my man, you have the gift of gab and that's the truth. I fucking surveyed a lot of people, bro.

[00:44:38] Eldar: Mm-hmm. I've watched a lot of shit. Mm-hmm. Motherfuckers dunno what the fuck they're talking about. Mm-hmm. The way you can be funny and stuff like that. You psych yourself out. Yeah. And, and the reason is, I think, is because you actually don't feel like you deserve of that success. Same thing here. 

[00:44:52] Harris: My, my childhood was great when I got to my adulthood.

[00:44:56] Harris: Mm-hmm. My, I felt like my life. It took a down spiral. 

[00:45:01] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:45:02] Harris: You know, I graduated high school. My mom ended up giving me the news that her and my Aunt Joe were moving to, uh, Florida 

[00:45:09] Harris: mm-hmm. 

[00:45:10] Harris: And leaving me and my brother there, and it's kinda like, what the fuck am I gonna do? 

[00:45:14] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:45:15] Harris: We, we tried to convince my uncle, my aunt, to let us stay in their, the trailer that they owned.

[00:45:21] Harris: Yeah. My uncle was fine with it. My aunt wasn't. He was like, no, no, no. Get him out. So I was like, what the fuck? This is family. It saying get him out. Mm-hmm. Me and my brother were agreeing to pay the rent and all this shit, and all this shit take over the lease. Uh, my brother found a place to go. I didn't Mm.

[00:45:38] Harris: My father's, my biological father's, uh, uh, I guess you can call him. Family friend, took care of him when he had cancer. All this shit had a condo that he had, that he had spare room that he rented out. Mm-hmm. He, he let us, he let me move in there. I paid $500 a month in rent. All this shit, he helped me there.

[00:45:57] Harris: Okay. Uh, it came to a point where, uh, disability started saying, you don't need it anymore. You know, you're fine. You're an adult. All this shit reviews and all this shit. I lost Social Security at this point. I was gonna be homeless. My mom, let me move in again. 

[00:46:10] Toliy: Mm-hmm. 

[00:46:11] Harris: What did she do? She gave, uh, me news again, and her and Aunt Joe were moving to a different part of Florida.

[00:46:17] Harris: Hmm. At this point, I was out again. I was working a job, working my fucking ass off. This is the fucking job. Trying to survive. Yeah. 

[00:46:26] Toliy: Got sick. 

[00:46:27] Harris: He got sick and all this shit. I'm living out of a hotel. My, I haven't asked my dad to help me again. Yeah. Pay for the hotel and all this shit. Yeah. Just my entire adulthood, adulthood turned into a spiral, fucking covid hit, lost the fucking, finally had a fucking apartment, a room, all this shit that I was paying rent on.

[00:46:45] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:46:45] Harris: Covid hit, lost a fucking job, moved back to New York, went into a fucking shelter. 

[00:46:50] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:46:50] Harris: My entire adulthood has been a, a spiral. A rollercoaster. Yeah. And I used to dream, like, I wish I can go back to being a fucking kid, figure out what I did fucking wrong and redo it. 

[00:47:01] Eldar: Really? Yeah. Are we giving you this opportunity?

[00:47:05] Eldar: You are. You love, you love us for that. I do. Man. Can I take off my pants right now? What the fuck, man? Oh my God. 

[00:47:10] Harris: You always gotta turn it into gay shit, man. I thought that's what you prefer. No, and I, I, I'm finally feeling like I'm somewhere in life. I'm getting my life together, but I'm still in the back of my head waiting for the hammer.

[00:47:22] Harris: Mm. You see? That's why I can't fully commit because at the same time, think I'm told 

[00:47:28] Eldar: you, you'll have to be able to fucking talk about this, bro. Because you had the same thing all for the same the past 10 years at the time. I 

[00:47:33] Harris: might be here, uh, but like the call reviews, I'd be hitting my vape because I'm waiting for the hammer to drop and in the back of my mind, yeah.

[00:47:39] Harris: I'm still looking. Yeah. To, to the side of me. What's the hammer? The hammer's like everything's gonna come falling around again. What does 

[00:47:46] Eldar: that, what does that look like? 

[00:47:48] Harris: Uh, just do it. I don't wanna say lose job. Okay. Um, but get little bit again. Yeah. Okay. You know? Yeah. 

[00:47:55] Eldar: Let's, let's be 

[00:47:56] Harris: honest. 

[00:47:56] Eldar: Did we give you a blueprint to be able to, uh, succeed and to be able to keep this job?

[00:48:00] Eldar: I. He did. 

[00:48:03] Toliy: Yeah. That, that, that it's like the, uh, like repetitive thing is like, like when, when it comes to like self-sabotaging all these things, I feel like, like when I also ref reflect back on it on my own, 

[00:48:14] Eldar: you had the same stuff. This is the same, um, testimony you had. Yeah. But, but like, Hey, I'm not supposed to succeed.

[00:48:19] Eldar: I'm not supposed to drive a nice car. When we bought the house, you're like, oh fuck man, this is too good to be true. This is not supposed to work for me. Like, I remember all those conversations. 

[00:48:27] Toliy: Yeah. But I feel like, um, a lot of it is that like these hammers come to us to, like those people in those moments, I feel like oftentimes because one, like, um, those people are not very resourceful at those times.

[00:48:46] Toliy: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Two, those people are very bad at asking for help. Yeah. Right. And then three, like they're ultimately just not putting themselves in a position to not, to not like. To not do that. 

[00:48:59] Harris: Right? Yeah. 

[00:49:00] Toliy: Like, oh, like, like if I don't study for a test, like the test is in two weeks. Okay. Like my usual self is like, I'm not gonna study or think about this at all until the night before.

[00:49:11] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:49:12] Toliy: And then the night before comes, it's too much. It's overwhelming. There's too much content Yeah. To review. Yeah. Fuck that. The test comes, you're nervous as hell. Yeah. You probably did bad on it. Yeah. Like you're upset afterwards. Right. You feel like right before it nervous Right. Everything. Yeah. Right.

[00:49:26] Toliy: But you knew it was coming. Yeah. And you didn't put yourself in a position to succeed. Yeah. So I feel like a lot of these things, it's like these hammers are going to continue to hit us over the head until we, um, take a proactive role. Yeah. Until we take a proactive role. So like, okay. So is a proactive role perseverance?

[00:49:45] Toliy: Well, I don't know. Like the proactive role to me is like actually putting yourself in positions to succeed so that there's no, there, there can't be a hammer. Like how could there be a hammer? If the work is put in, the effort is made and there's a desire to like learn, and then that's actually put into action with actual actions.

[00:50:07] Toliy: But if there's no actions, there's no proactive desire to learn, the hammer is coming. It's 100% you hurt. So if we don't do all that, it's giving you the answer. If we don't do all that, then when we get to a point where we feel the hammer is coming, it's because we know that we're guilty. We we know that like, okay, we kind of fucked up that that's a reality and we need a bail.

[00:50:27] Eldar: Okay, bail out. I would like to exert myself of the responsibility of you, of hitting you over the head with a hammer and then feeling bad or guilty about it. So I'm gonna ask the following question. Mm-hmm. Are you clear? What you should be doing or should, 

[00:50:45] Harris: you're going back to the asking for help, accepting the help.

[00:50:48] Harris: Shit. Okay. Well, there's a couple. I have trouble 

[00:50:50] Eldar: doing that. Well, there's a couple of things, right? There's a couple of things, okay. You, you can say that all you want, that you have trouble doing stuff, but there's a couple of things that you can, that are low hanging fruit if you want to put right number 

[00:51:03] Eldar: one, okay?

[00:51:05] Eldar: I'm gonna give you this right At your job, for example, okay? Get your tasks done, okay? Mm-hmm. 

[00:51:16] Harris: Complete. 

[00:51:16] Eldar: Okay? 

[00:51:17] Eldar: Not saying to get them done in a superb way, in like the best way possible. Mm-hmm. You don't know that you don't have the knowledge yet to do that, but at least complete them, even if it's halfway half-assed because you know, I'm expecting it from you to do it right.

[00:51:33] Eldar: It's stupid for me. Number two, be nice. That's a easy one. I'm trying, okay. But do you see it be nice? Don't be a dick. I 

[00:51:43] Harris: have a resting bitch 

[00:51:44] Eldar: face, man. I have a resting. It's a bitch attitude. It's different from having a face. Have the bitch face all you want. You know what I'm saying? That's not a problem for me.

[00:51:51] Harris: I try to come in here and I'm having more and more of a smile. I'm trying to be a good person, but that's it. 

[00:51:56] Eldar: And I'm telling you right now, there's times when you are very nice and you're very pleasant and it's nice to have, but then there's times where you're a dick. You're not being nice to Mike, you're not being nice.

[00:52:08] Eldar: Totally. You know what I mean? You're being demanding and stuff like that, you know? It's just be nice, easy, right? And then the next level stuff is to be curious. Ask questions, fucked up on something. Hey, the fuck happened here. Didn't do something. Hey, I forgot. Can I find a way to improve? You know, there's small little things.

[00:52:33] Eldar: That can get you to a place where you don't have to wait for the fucking hammer to drop, because you will see successes, slow successes, building up. And these are simple things. 

[00:52:42] Harris: I'm getting, I'm doing my tasks, I'm doing certain things. Okay. I'm having trouble with the attitude. 

[00:52:48] Eldar: Are we giving you the the path to success?

[00:52:51] Eldar: Yes or no? 

[00:52:52] Harris: Yes. 

[00:52:53] Eldar: Okay. I'm working on 

[00:52:54] Harris: one thing. You go, how do I work on the 

[00:52:56] Eldar: other at the same time? Well, that's a very good question. You see that? Keep asking that question and you'll be in a good place. How about that? We don't have to answer it right now, Harris. We can answer it throughout the week. Keep asking questions.

[00:53:08] Toliy: Yeah, but that, that's the thing. Is that like that that is forgotten. 

[00:53:12] Eldar: Well, we know why that 

[00:53:13] Toliy: is. Yeah. 

[00:53:14] Eldar: We know why that is. 

[00:53:15] Toliy: That's that's what I'm saying. So when it's forgotten, we're trying 

[00:53:17] Eldar: our best here. 

[00:53:18] Toliy: Yeah. When it's for forgotten, we're here. And it's just like, we're gonna talk about this in the week, two weeks, a month, a few, few months.

[00:53:24] Toliy: Yeah. It's gonna be the same thing. Well, you know, hey, be nice bro. Don't be fucking 

[00:53:28] Eldar: pessimistic 

[00:53:28] Toliy: here. 

[00:53:28] Eldar: Well, no, I'm saying 

[00:53:29] Toliy: that like this is what happens to people. That like, you can avoid the hammer by doing particular actions, but like, I don't even know what it is. Like the, uh, the, I dunno if you wanna call it like the laziness or the being used to a particular, like, routine or like reasons why we don't go take action to put ourselves in better positions.

[00:53:52] Toliy: Like, I'm not sure what's the reason for, for that not happening. 

[00:53:56] Eldar: Mike, what do you think? Oh, we don't deserve it. We don't deserve it. And we know it and we know it. See, I fucking knew Mike fucking knew the answer question. Yeah. But then how 

[00:54:05] Toliy: do you get to a point where you deserve it? Be fucking nice. 

[00:54:09] Harris: I'm trying, man.

[00:54:10] Harris: I come in with a smile. I try to smile throughout the day. I try to Hey, but 

[00:54:13] Eldar: some of your habits, man. I know you're rude. I know, but that is a habit. You're a bad attitude, man. That's how I, yeah. That's how No manners. Yeah. No manners's. 

[00:54:21] Harris: I have to 

[00:54:23] Eldar: half what? That's how I Harris' been my entire life. Sure. Harris.

[00:54:27] Eldar: But, but it's not true. It's not true. Because there's times, there's moments mm-hmm. That you show. Mm-hmm. To be nice and you're pleasant to be around. So it's not true that it's mm-hmm. A hundred percent takeover habit. My cousin is more negative than you are. You know what I'm saying? You're a negative too.

[00:54:45] Eldar: 100%. But I think my cousin is more, you know what I mean? Mm-hmm. And, you know, uh, he was here for two months. We try to break down. It's the same thing. Be nice. I'm trying. Okay. Keep trying. You, do you see why, for reasons why to be, keep trying that? Because it's not only just the right thing to do. It feels better now, doesn't it?

[00:55:03] Harris: Yeah, 

[00:55:04] Eldar: it does. Because that's what keeps your bipolar at bay. No, we, we use bipolar again. Well, 100%. Because that's your ultimate boss. That's your goal is to beat that, right. To finally reverse a psychological disorder or whatever it is that you're struggling. 

[00:55:23] Harris: There are times you know that the police comes out during the day, but there are times I forget too.

[00:55:30] Harris: Do what? Use the words please. Thank you. All this. Yeah, 

[00:55:34] Eldar: yeah, 

[00:55:34] Toliy: yeah. See, like a desperate person is not forgetting that, for example. 

[00:55:39] Eldar: Sure. You know? Sure. But I, I don't think he is in a, in a desperate place. 

[00:55:42] Toliy: That's what I'm saying. 

[00:55:43] Harris: Yeah. You know, there are times where, you know, I'm bringing up my dad again. Don't start with me.

[00:55:51] Harris: Don't start. Okay. We won't. I'm looking at you. Okay. There are times, you know, because my dad has been hinting it when he was saying, you know, you gotta look for another job because eventually these guys are gonna give up on you. They're gonna give up on teaching you these things and all this shit.

[00:56:08] Harris: Teaching you what things? The sales. He's focused on the sales. Okay. He doesn't get that. You're trying to, what do 

[00:56:13] Eldar: you mean? He doesn't get, he doesn't get, because you don't explain it to him. I don't 

[00:56:15] Harris: know how to explain it correctly. Okay, 

[00:56:17] Eldar: cool. So you don't actually explain it to him if you don't know how to explain it correctly.

[00:56:20] Eldar: You don't actually explain it at all. Right. Therefore, he doesn't know what's actually going on. Mm-hmm. Did you tell him that you're getting paid to, to get education, to go to school? You see? You said he wouldn't understand. Well, why wouldn't you try? 

[00:56:34] Harris: Because he, you don't know how to put the words together.

[00:56:36] Harris: You know? Lemme put it this way. I tried comparing this, right? That I'm learning. There's, I'm, I'm starting to get better. 

[00:56:43] Eldar: You've been here almost a year. 

[00:56:44] Harris: Yeah. 

[00:56:46] Eldar: I said that you, you are, um, financially you are a whole 

[00:56:51] Harris: mm-hmm. 

[00:56:52] Eldar: In any other company, you would've been fired. 

[00:56:54] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:56:54] Eldar: Okay. We are investing time.

[00:56:57] Eldar: Mm-hmm. And money, and time and money into you. So maybe one day you are able to be a productive member of this company. 

[00:57:05] Harris: See, my dad is all about chasing the money, chasing the money. And you know, I said that I'm learning. I'm learning. Mm-hmm. There's certain things I'm getting better at, you know? I, I pulled up my, my, uh, Salesforce on the laptop.

[00:57:21] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[00:57:22] Harris: I said that there was a time when I wasn't bringing anything in. I'm starting to bring little bits. Little bits. It's not a lot. Yeah. He goes, yes, but what's this gonna do for your paycheck? What are you gonna get from this? 

[00:57:33] Toliy: Yeah. And 

[00:57:33] Harris: I was like, you know, dad, I say, you know, you say I do my job, but I'm still learning things every day.

[00:57:40] Harris: Yeah. I said, I'm trying to learn things every day. I'm trying to get better. There was a point where I wasn't bringing anything into the company at little bits at a time. I'm improving. Yeah. He doesn't want to hear it. He goes, yeah, but what's this gonna bring to you? What, what's this gonna add to your bank?

[00:57:53] Harris: He's too focused on Yeah. The bank. He doesn't wanna see the things I'm starting to improve on. 

[00:57:59] Eldar: What if we removed your bonus from sales? Mm-hmm. Okay. And attach the bonus to you being nice. I can do this. What do you mean? You don't understand what I just said? No. You're confusing me, man. Totally. That's good.

[00:58:15] Eldar: I like it. Imagine no longer will you get a bonus from your sales. Mm-hmm. But you will get a bonus if you are nice. 

[00:58:28] Toliy: That would be the gayish shit over. 

[00:58:31] Harris: How would you explain that to my, my dad? Like, 

[00:58:33] Eldar: no, no, no. That's not my problem. Mm. That's your problem. 

[00:58:36] Harris: He would say, that's the gay shit. I really good. He 

[00:58:40] Eldar: doesn't have to know, does he?

[00:58:42] Eldar: You could show him what you do. You can take your pants off. 

[00:58:44] Harris: What is wrong with you? Man? 

[00:58:47] Eldar: He seen me in my 

[00:58:47] Harris: man, because I'll 

[00:58:49] Eldar: pay for that. 

[00:58:50] Harris: Hey, I'll pay for that. You pay for that? Oh, I still have to, uh, for him to be nice. Yeah. Oh, I still, yo, where's that camera? Okay, where's that camera? 

[00:58:59] Eldar: Because it's impossible, Harris.

[00:59:01] Harris: I 

[00:59:02] Eldar: know. You know why? Because you don't have it in you. 

[00:59:03] Harris: Thanks.

[00:59:08] Harris: I still have to do that camera thing. You gotta give me the mm-hmm. Yeah. The tripod. We got that. So cannot explain the triplet. Yeah. Like what did you do to work today? Yeah. I made this killer cap that my, my boss grades on. Yeah. You gotta give. I can't wait. You gotta give it to me. I will. I definitely will.

[00:59:27] Eldar: But 

[00:59:28] Harris: I gotta figure out a way to set it up. And you can't help me set it up because I can get inside. He's gonna see Yeah. On the camera. In the living room. Yeah. We're doing this. It's motion sensor. 

[00:59:37] Toliy: Yeah. 

[00:59:38] Harris: That turns blue the moment someone moves in the room. 

[00:59:42] Eldar: Yeah. What are we saying, Mike? Yeah, it's interesting.

[00:59:49] Eldar: It's an interesting phenomenon or what Well, 

[00:59:50] Mike: yeah. Part of like, you know, as I was playing out those thoughts in my head after I, yeah. When I spoke with Toll and afterwards Yeah. I a hundred percent related to the failure, like the not lack of success with the girls. And I knew this is a hundred percent Yeah.

[01:00:02] Mike: The lack of believing yourself. Yeah. But yeah, being able to climb further. 

[01:00:06] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:00:07] Mike: Broke when I thought I was done broke, I was like, okay, I'm not done. I have more, I started to more believe in myself. 

[01:00:14] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:00:15] Mike: You know, I started to understand that I actually can do more confidence. Yeah. More confidence. You know, like, uh, and I still haven't done it.

[01:00:22] Mike: I went back, you know, one more day. I haven't done it yet, you know, but I, and I tried it, you know? Yeah. But, um, I'm trying to learn how to tap into that now. Yeah. You know, because it's, uh, I'm mean 30, 30, 40 years, bro. Whatever. I'm almost 40. I never did things that way. 

[01:00:41] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:00:41] Mike: So now I'm trying to. Do it. And I also know, like, and we spoke about this Oli, like, if you're there, I know you can push me and I'll 

[01:00:49] Eldar: get it.

[01:00:50] Eldar: Because like, well, no, I can't. Huh? I can't. I've argued with you. I was like, yo, go do it. You're like, nah. You know what I mean? Like you gave up prematurely on the red on whatever. Oh, on the, on the red. I was talking about the trail you've showed with the girls. Yes. No, no. Whatever. Girls or the red, right.

[01:01:06] Eldar: Yeah. Whatever you've prematurely gave up on me. 

[01:01:08] Mike: Yeah. 

[01:01:09] Eldar: You know what I mean? Where I'm like, yo, you could do more. You're like, no. 

[01:01:12] Mike: Yeah, yeah. 

[01:01:12] Eldar: You know what I'm saying? So I can't push you. Mm-hmm. It's you who can push you. I have to learn how to push myself. Course. Yeah. Well, that's why I'd like to learn. Yeah.

[01:01:19] Eldar: I'm only there as a judge for the moment. I'm like, mm-hmm. I know you're stronger than that. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? Like Yeah. You know, I'm like, what? Wait, put your foot there or do this or do that. Like, I know, you know? Mm-hmm. But. Your mind is the block 

[01:01:34] Harris: Psychologically. Yeah, the block is there. Yeah.

[01:01:36] Harris: Yeah, for sure. See, I just thought of something. Ohoh. Ohoh gay. That's disgust, man. I'm not doing what you want me to do. Man's disgust man's. I'm not pulling my pants down on his podcast. Yo. This guy, he wants to get back into the training exercise. 'cause every time, uh, he, he comes in the office. Mm-hmm. He likes to close the door and lift up his shirt and he thinks some weird stuff is gonna happen.

[01:01:57] Harris: Man. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You know, you need to relax that. All right. Tell us what you thought before I go pee. All right. So I, I had a prediction that I might have accepted Okay. That the hammer is gonna drop and just accepted the fact that it is gonna drop in my life. Okay? 

[01:02:15] Eldar: Yeah. Is that a bad thing?

[01:02:16] Eldar: Yeah, it is. You see that? 

[01:02:19] Harris: Why? 'cause it happened so many times, but why? I'm convinced it's gonna happen again and there's nothing I can do to, yeah. Stop it. See, our job is to 

[01:02:28] Eldar: show you that. You don't have to think that way. 

[01:02:32] Mike: Right. 

[01:02:32] Eldar: And 

[01:02:33] Mike: we're batt for you. But the only way you can not think that way if you don't act in according to that wall.

[01:02:38] Mike: 100%. Yeah. That's the kicker. 

[01:02:40] Eldar: You know, 

[01:02:41] Mike: you can't be my 

[01:02:42] Eldar: shit. I know, I know. You can rap or run laps around those girls. Are you kidding me? 

[01:02:47] Harris: What the hell are you talking about? They're fucking 

[01:02:49] Eldar: dumb as fuck. You keep talking about girls. 

[01:02:50] Harris: What the fuck going on here? Well, 

[01:02:52] Eldar: Mike understands this. Mm-hmm. Okay. And Mike will give you some private conversation about what he's talking about.

[01:02:56] Eldar: What we're talking about. Non gay. Non gay. Why do you always gotta make it private, man? Well, listen, we talked about this for a very long time. Many podcasts. You 

[01:03:04] Harris: keep saying running laps. What are we doing running? Are you racing them? What the fuck going on here? Okay, 

[01:03:08] Eldar: well, what I'm saying is that the girls that Mike is attracted to, he can own them.

[01:03:14] Eldar: Like, I don't know, how do, how do I say it in the fucking his terms like. Bash them. Like, I don't know what, what terms do you understand? Like he can take them down, take them down, yeah. Conquer them and like, like stick in there, claw them and like stick it in there. He can do whatever he wants with them.

[01:03:32] Eldar: Right? Twist, 

[01:03:33] Toliy: twist his dick in the 

[01:03:34] Eldar: what? What the fuck twist is? Twist dick and bite it. This is not the old dick twist man. Yeah. What ceiling. So I see again, I'm convinced of that. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like I know it because Mike is witty. Mike is funny. Mike can do this shit. Mike can, you know, like all that stuff.

[01:03:51] Eldar: And I know it works. Like, especially girls, are you fucking kidding me? You know what I mean? Especially the ones that he's after. You know what I mean? They're nobodies. You know what I mean? What 

[01:03:57] Harris: the fuck? That's fucked. 

[01:03:59] Eldar: They're really, really dumb. They're really dumb. You know what I mean? The block. Yeah. The VDIs.

[01:04:04] Eldar: Well, yeah, because, because of what he attracts, you know, whatever. For now, that's why I'm like, this is easy stuff, you know? Yeah. But you don't believe that. So, yeah. So I think failure. Or, or fear mm-hmm. To succeed is a big one. 

[01:04:18] Mike: How do you, uh, get that sucker? Get that 

[01:04:23] Eldar: sucker, like in my situation, it's very clear.

[01:04:28] Eldar: Right? Well, you just in the beginning stages of realizing what the fuck is going on with you, like, I mean, you've known mm-hmm. And we've been raising awareness about this. Yeah. But, um, the bad attitude that, that propels these, uh, demons. The negative self-talk, you mean? Yes. Okay. Yes. Mm-hmm. Um, is what gives you the results that you're getting.

[01:04:48] Eldar: Mm-hmm. So, yeah, you have to fight. You have to fight back. You have to fight. You have to fight. You know? And I think ultimately it's al also through like having a good attitude, probably. Mm-hmm. Towards yourself. Yeah. More, more than anything. Mm-hmm. You know, because. If you're not showing it to us, if we don't see it, we can't point it out.

[01:05:06] Eldar: Mm-hmm. But if you're talking negatively, self-talk by yourself. 

[01:05:09] Harris: Mm-hmm. You 

[01:05:09] Eldar: know, and like anxiety on those other crap. Mm-hmm. This is the reason why you're failing. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? 

[01:05:16] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:05:17] Eldar: So,

[01:05:25] Eldar: Hmm.

[01:05:32] Eldar: Say something, man,

[01:05:36] Eldar: you know what? 

[01:05:40] Harris: Oh my God, you, you're getting it a little bit, or No, it's, it's, it's hitting right. Oh, am I getting it? 

[01:05:45] Eldar: No, no. I think 

[01:05:47] Harris: it's 

[01:05:47] Eldar: for 

[01:05:47] Harris: everyone, right? 

[01:05:51] Eldar: Oh, man. It's a tough fucking thing, man. It's a tough thing to accept the fact that the only reason why you are not succeeding is you. 

[01:05:58] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:06:00] Eldar: Right, like you are standing on the way of that which you're actually chasing the dream, the key.

[01:06:08] Eldar: Why'd you do that, man? The dream. Well, the Dr whatever the fuck dream you have in your head, you know what I mean, of succeeding and stuff like that, is that you are doing it. And I think that every time we talk about these types of topics in this podcast is, it all comes back to can you point a finger at yourself and say genuinely and accept the fact that you are the reason for your failure.

[01:06:28] Eldar: If you can, then you have to act right. That propels your ass and gives you kick in the asses to say, 

[01:06:35] Toliy: yeah. See, that's the thing I have a big problem with is the, the lack of acting. 

[01:06:40] Eldar: Well, because you, you are looking for accountability, Tony. I get it. We always have the same conversation. You're looking for accountability.

[01:06:47] Eldar: I get it. We're just trying to figure out how can you learn to get to the, this place of that you are the one who's accountable for your life and you can do it if you want to, if you really want to. 

[01:06:59] Toliy: Yeah, I feel like Do you really want to, yeah, I feel like there's like a, I don't even know how to describe it, but there's like a haze that people are in.

[01:07:07] Eldar: Well, yeah. Like I can't wait for him to break through and understand what we're talking about. I can't wait to live that. Right. I can't wait to, maybe you break through the things that you were talking about. Marketing and like really being that next level or whatever. I can't wait to see that. Right. But like taking, uh, ownership of it or Mike with the girls, I can't wait for that to finally like click and be like, yo, like I got this.

[01:07:32] Eldar: And like he's sharing the story of love. You know how we sat down and holy hands and I told you how I was falling in love and stuff like that. Mm-hmm. I can't wait for that. You know what I mean? Because I know it's coming. I don't know when, but that's gonna be a crazy nice moment. Everything will finally tie in.

[01:07:48] Eldar: Mm-hmm. And you're like, yo, you know, like I can't wait for that. 'cause I think it's coming. You know what I mean? Yeah. For all of us, you know, for whatever things that we're trying to accomplish. Mm-hmm. You know, so, but there's hurdles that need to jump over. Yeah. Per, it's, it's all personal hurdles. Yeah. And perseverance I think is a very interesting, um, what's his name?

[01:08:10] Eldar: Uh, topic for this type, this type of stuff. 

[01:08:13] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:08:13] Eldar: You got a glimpse of it on the fucking, on the wall. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? I know that because like you even asked me like, yo, you go through that. I'm like, I go through that too. Like when I saw them jumping the way they were from one place to another, I'm like, bro, I can do that.

[01:08:26] Eldar: That's easy in my head. Mm-hmm. But then when I got up there, I'm like, what the fuck? Yeah. My body don't act like this. Like this is weird. Mm-hmm. To jump this way. Yeah. Across the wall, bro. I can leap that probably without jumping in the middle one if I wanted to. 

[01:08:39] Mike: Yeah. Well, I think so. 

[01:08:41] Eldar: Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

[01:08:42] Eldar: Just off that you can reach, reach off. No problem. You know what I mean? But in, in that moment, I needed to go through the motions. 

[01:08:48] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:08:49] Eldar: You know what I mean? The self-doubt and all the other stuff. Right. You know? Mm-hmm. But I knew inside that I'll do it and I did it. 

[01:08:55] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:08:55] Eldar: You know what I mean? Yeah.

[01:08:56] Eldar: Easy. Mm-hmm. And I'll keep doing it Easy is if I keep practicing, you know? Mm-hmm. So

[01:09:03] Eldar: maybe, yeah, maybe the perseverance part is the, between trying it and then failing and then not believing yourself and not trying again. You know what I mean? Like mm-hmm. The failing part. That's what we're talking about. 

[01:09:17] Mike: But I do want to keep trying it. Like I don't, but you know, am I trying it already?

[01:09:21] Mike: Coming in there with the idea that I'm gonna fail? Is that what you're saying? That's what it sounds like. Yeah. Mm-hmm. 

[01:09:26] Eldar: Yeah. That you're predestined to fail, because as soon as you remove that, you'll do it. Mm. How you remove it. 

[01:09:35] Mike: See? 

[01:09:36] Toliy: Yeah. I can remove it for you if you'd like. 

[01:09:38] Mike: Sure. Go get it. 

[01:09:40] Toliy: You know how old?

[01:09:42] Eldar: Yeah. Hmm. How. Do you know how or no? Well, I didn't think about it. I mean, it seems like you got the answer, so I'll go with it. 

[01:09:48] Toliy: No, no, but do you think, do you know how How to 

[01:09:50] Eldar: remove it? 

[01:09:51] Toliy: Yeah, 

[01:09:52] Eldar: erase. I can remove it from Mike Erase. Erase it from his memory? 

[01:09:55] Toliy: No. 

[01:09:56] Eldar: Oh, 

[01:09:56] Toliy: this particular thing? 

[01:09:59] Eldar: No, I don't on on him climbing and doing the thing.

[01:10:05] Eldar: This bear be very clever. Come on. I don't know. Come 

[01:10:11] Mike: on. Put a girl in the front. Oh, 

[01:10:14] Eldar: no, 

[01:10:14] Mike: no. That's a good motivation. 

[01:10:17] Eldar: Oh yeah, I know. I know. Okay. Totally has to come. 

[01:10:21] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:10:22] Eldar: Oh, yeah. 

[01:10:23] Toliy: Yeah. Why? 

[01:10:24] Eldar: I know. Because there's a revenge thing. Yes. 

[01:10:27] Toliy: Yes. See, there's a, has to be I now I could bring that out. Yes. Where I could piss him off enough.

[01:10:31] Toliy: Yes. That he's gonna persevere. A 

[01:10:32] Eldar: motivator. 

[01:10:33] Toliy: Motivator. Yes. And he's gonna go and break through. Yeah. Yeah. But that's not a good go about. No, no, no, no, no. But that says a 

[01:10:40] Eldar: lot. 

[01:10:40] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:10:41] Eldar: That says a lot. Right. Where Mike only tries when he is challenged in a very specific way. Yeah. And I, I agree with totally.

[01:10:50] Eldar: Actually, I do agree with him. I do agree with him. Mm-hmm. That Mike finds some kind of, like, finally, like this is a justified reason as to why I should do it. Mm-hmm. Why is that? Why is your defense has never been better than when you played against Toley? Because he's a, he's a fist pig 

[01:11:09] Mike: because he, he, no, you have something against him.

[01:11:12] Mike: Well, because he was harassing me for many years. Yes, exactly. Yeah, exactly. I'm just trying to get back with mine, bro. Exactly. You see? Yeah. He 

[01:11:19] Harris: took his fucking dignity, bro. Yeah, that's crazy how you extracted that. You what you want. Mike went to prison in you. Yeah, 

[01:11:29] Eldar: yeah, yeah. Exactly. You see, 

[01:11:32] Harris: he took his dignity.

[01:11:33] Harris: Mm-hmm. And now he's gotta kill you to get it back. 

[01:11:34] Eldar: Why do you have that Right? For a very specific thing? Mm-hmm. But not naturally or organically? Because I told you I could turn it on. 

[01:11:41] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:11:42] Eldar: I could turn it on. Mm-hmm. And it's on. Yeah. It doesn't have to be Totally. Or somebody talking shit or whatever. I could do it.

[01:11:47] Eldar: I could do it as a switch. You know what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. It just has to be one small little thing and I can just do it, you know? Mm-hmm. I have to have a reason to do it. Yeah. You know, for your, in your case, right. You have a very specific reason for now. 

[01:12:00] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:12:00] Eldar: Right. It's not a voluntary one that you can control.

[01:12:02] Eldar: Yeah, 

[01:12:02] Mike: yeah, 

[01:12:03] Eldar: yeah. Somebody gotta piss you off. 

[01:12:05] Mike: Yeah. Yeah. Well, I, I think that's, is that competition or No? No. I, that's a revenge. It is revenge. Through anger. 

[01:12:12] Eldar: Through 

[01:12:12] Mike: anger. Yeah. That's 

[01:12:12] Eldar: right. You have to get a little aggro. 

[01:12:14] Harris: Someone's gotta disrespect you. Like yell fat ass, get off the wall type shit. That's right.

[01:12:18] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Get off of You don't belong here. Yeah. Like, what? Are you crazy? Go back to eating. It's like in the movie. 

[01:12:25] Toliy: Uh, remember in, uh, water Boy? 

[01:12:28] Eldar: Mm-hmm. No, I, well. 

[01:12:31] Harris: You ever watched a movie? Of course. Seen it. Of course. Yeah. He has to, he has to vision this person talking shit about him. He has to vision this shit about, uh, oh.

[01:12:40] Harris: Yeah. What is it? The, the, the guard or the linebacker always being baby. He had to vision them, talking shit about his mama and all this different shit. And then he goes, don't talk shit about my mama any fucking ram. 

[01:12:53] Toliy: Yeah. Yeah. Like he, he would envision that the opposing player Yeah. Would be talking shit about him.

[01:12:58] Toliy: Shit about his mom. Like, like they would just yell. Needle dick. Needle dick. Yeah. Yeah. He didn't his. Yeah. That's crazy. Remember? I remember this movie. Yes. And then he would go haywire. Yeah. And then he would just fucking sack the quarterback. No. He would just turn into like a fucking or all star player retard from the fucking boy, you know?

[01:13:14] Toliy: Or definitely 

[01:13:18] Harris: his coach would be, his coach would be he ous coach talking shit. And he'd fucking push him all the way to the other fucking side of the field, like, fucking idiot. Yeah. And 

[01:13:26] Toliy: he would be raging before the play even starts. He, he would like, he would just hear like the voice of the people. Like, like, like, you suck Bobby, you suck.

[01:13:33] Toliy: Mm-hmm. Like, your mom's this, you know, and then he would just go fucking nuts. Mm-hmm. Mom, ya, pappy. Yeah. 

[01:13:40] Eldar: Listen, this is not a, um, uncommon phenomenon. We see this in UFC. Some fighters need beef in order to perform. Yeah. Right. They need to find something like they make fake 

[01:13:50] Mike: beef. 

[01:13:50] Eldar: Correct. 

[01:13:51] Mike: Yeah. 

[01:13:51] Eldar: Right. Even John Jones explained that too.

[01:13:53] Eldar: You know, where like, look, I need to, I need to dislike this guy. Mm-hmm. Yeah. What did he say? He'll examine that stuff to see, to nitpick. Yeah. Like something bad. They fake 

[01:14:00] Toliy: this nice guy. Yeah. You know, sudden he has to be like this. I 

[01:14:03] Eldar: wouldn't be able to fight someone in the neutral fucking grounds either.

[01:14:06] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Like, I don't, I don't see how that works. Mm-hmm. Right. Uh, because fighting is almost like, oh yeah, that's a very interesting topic too. Fighting almost is like, um, a justice play. Mm-hmm. Right. Where like, you gotta beat somebody up for a reason. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? Yeah. So I think that fighters do find, uh, a lot of them are look for this little thing mm-hmm.

[01:14:27] Eldar: To get them ignited. And I've heard them before mm-hmm. Their testimonies, you know, that like, they need that very specific thing mm-hmm. In order to get them going. 

[01:14:34] Toliy: Yeah. You 

[01:14:34] Eldar: know, and you, this is what he described. Yeah. You played the best defense on Totally. Yeah. A hundred percent bro. I never seen in you locked in.

[01:14:43] Eldar: Yeah. Like the way you lock in. Yeah. Like I, like I told you, I don't have anything against Flo, for example. Mm-hmm. But I can lock him down and I don't give a fuck. Like I don't have anything against him. Mm-hmm. He's not a bad kid. Yeah. He never disrespected me like somebody else would or whatever, like did or whatever.

[01:14:58] Eldar: But I can lock him down because I have a mission in my head. Maybe you need something else in order to get on that mission. 

[01:15:04] Harris: Maybe you just, uh, gotta make like a recording, a totally saying all this horrible shit and whatever Mike's on the wall, you just have. Oh, sure. But 

[01:15:12] Eldar: that's silly. No, I don't want, do we don't want to do that.

[01:15:14] Eldar: No. We we're trying to find an organic way. Right. To persevere. This is what it comes down to. Perseverance. Mm-hmm. Right. The seals right. Why the fuck that that seal is ready to drown for his cause? Why? 

[01:15:26] Harris: Maybe the way to talk some sense into me, man, or knock some sense into my brain is you gotta put me in one of those mixed martial arts, uh, matches.

[01:15:34] Harris: And I just gotta get my head fucking beat in a couple times. It's a 

[01:15:37] Eldar: very interesting that you say that because totally always recommending that you just get beat every time you come here, you get beat with a stick. No withs, a cucumber. A cucumber doesn't fuck what the fuck is. Why does it gotta be, 

[01:15:47] Harris: why does it gotta be that shape?

[01:15:48] Harris: Man? You sick. Fuck man. You said sick. Fuck. That's disgusting, man. Yeah, you said it, not me. Yeah, you chose a cucumber, bro. 

[01:15:54] Eldar: You were preferring an act plan. You want it to be girthy 

[01:15:56] Harris: on the top. Fuck what? What are you hitting me, man? Man, fuck. That's disgusting. He already comes in the office all the time. Close the door and lift up that shirt like it's the fuck, man.

[01:16:05] Harris: I don't need him with a cucumber, man. That's disgust, man. 

[01:16:11] Eldar: So yeah. Are we saying anything about perseverance? The reasons behind it. Motivation behind it. Right. Yeah. See, like rock climbing is a very interesting fucking sport, bro. Because you have to face yourself. Yeah. He went to to the gym by himself. I wasn't even there.

[01:16:25] Eldar: I was not recording anything. Right. So he has to talk to himself. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That's an interesting phenomenon like 

[01:16:31] Toliy: that. There's like the people who are the best. I know that's a good thing. Thing. People who are, who are like, like in sport, the people who are the best. Yeah. They're never competing against anyone else.

[01:16:39] Toliy: I 

[01:16:39] Eldar: told them this earlier. Yeah. Too. I said Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant. The reason why they're the best is because they were able to tap in into that thing On their own. On their own. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. And they just went into that zone and that zone is what drove them. There was nobody standing in front of them.

[01:16:56] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:16:57] Eldar: But them. Yeah. But them. That's it. Oh, yeah. I mean, that's why the difference is that, I mean, they're constantly arguing this debate with LeBron James and shit. Mm-hmm. And I clearly see that he's, he, you know, he's more so weak minded. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? He doesn't have that thing. Mm-hmm. And I see the difference between that thing.

[01:17:14] Eldar: Yeah. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? And the simps, they don't see it. That's why they're like, prop, LeBron James is the king or whatever, but he's not because he doesn't have that 

[01:17:24] Toliy: kind. Yeah. And then it, it, um, it's being especially exposed now 'cause everyone is showing that like, thank you. He has no friends, no one likes him.

[01:17:30] Toliy: Correct. He just has this like, circle of people. Yes. And that it, he's everyone just like, acts a particular way. 

[01:17:36] Eldar: Thank you. Thank 

[01:17:37] Toliy: you to him. But we've seen this for a very long time. 

[01:17:39] Toliy: Tell him Mike, though, like, I love shooting the ball on like, game point. Like, I look forward to it. Like, like, like I can't wait to fucking, I don't 

[01:17:45] Mike: wanna, you know, hit 

[01:17:46] Toliy: that far shot.

[01:17:47] Toliy: Yeah. Like from like Yeah. Like when it's point game, like that's my favorite time. 

[01:17:51] Eldar: Yeah. You know? Yeah. Well, you like pressure, you said? 

[01:17:54] Toliy: Well, like, I like, like, like I wanna put myself in a position to take that shot. Like, I don't wanna Yeah. Like, I mean, I'm gonna pass it if I like have to or, or, or somebody's like completely open.

[01:18:04] Toliy: Right? Yeah. I'll make the right play. Yeah. But like, like, I like to make that play. 

[01:18:08] Eldar: See, that's the difference between somebody who's looking forward to it, where somebody who shined away from it. Of course. Of course. You know what I'm, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'll tell you right now, in the early days when I was in the zone more of scoring, I'd have that too.

[01:18:22] Eldar: Mm-hmm. In the later days where I want to make sure that the best shot is taken, I trust a shot better than mine. Mm-hmm. Like, it's just what it is. Mm-hmm. It's a, it's a smarter play because I'm not putting pressure on myself mm-hmm. Because I know I can miss, and my percentage is less mm-hmm. Than his is Yeah.

[01:18:38] Eldar: When I know what he pulls up from far away and it's a higher percentage to get it in. 

[01:18:42] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:18:43] Eldar: So, and I know I could hit him at the time where he has enough time to fucking mm-hmm. Release it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? So we can get a better shot there. So over time, I relieve the pressure. But it was a smart decision to make it.

[01:18:55] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Where he, I relied on him. 

[01:18:58] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:18:58] Eldar: You know what I mean? And when he didn't take the shot, I was so pissed. 

[01:19:01] Toliy: Mm-hmm. 

[01:19:02] Eldar: I was so pissed. Yeah, I know. Because I worked so hard. Or you, you didn't take the layup or you did something weird 'cause up on you because created that. What the fuck is wrong with you? You know what I mean?

[01:19:12] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Like the finisher should finish. Mm-hmm. Your layups versus in his lay in his shots. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Interesting. Yeah. But LeBron James is not that guy. No, not that guy. 

[01:19:23] Toliy: No. 

[01:19:23] Eldar: We know it. And they all see it now. It's all coming out. It's been, it was supposed to come out, you know what I mean?

[01:19:28] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Um, Carmel Anthony fucking retired on time. 

[01:19:33] Toliy: Yeah. But mm-hmm. But yeah, back to what we're talking about, like, like this happened to me plenty of times where like. Like, uh, like I wanna do something. I'll say like, Hey, I wanna learn something or get better at something. But like, I'm in this like, haze where it's just like, like, it feels like a foggy like land.

[01:19:51] Toliy: Mm-hmm. And you're just like in the forest. Mm-hmm. And it's foggy and you, and you can only see like six feet in front of you. Yeah. And getting out of that place and then being able to see like, okay, like I can see, like, I can do something, I could like take this step. I could do that. Mm-hmm. That, to me is always, always, like the hard part.

[01:20:09] Toliy: Right. And then like, when you observe someone who's in that, but then they say that like, they want to do something or they wanna learn something, or like they wanna accomplish something. Mm-hmm. But they don't do anything about it. Like, they don't repetitively, like they don't have either like, the stamina to like keep trying or they don't have like, the stamina to like do something like every single day, for example.

[01:20:32] Toliy: Yeah. Or like that, like, like usually those people are not those types of people that can like, like actually put in the work. Like actually. Um, a ask for help actually be resourceful. Like actually get curious, like, like, it, it, it, it, it almost appears as if it's like a laziness type thing, which, which I'm not sure like what it is exactly.

[01:20:53] Toliy: No, no. There's no such thing 

[01:20:54] Eldar: as laziness. Totally. Yeah. There's no such thing, man. Well, no, 

[01:20:57] Toliy: la laziness is like trying to do something that you actually don't want to do. Right. 

[01:21:02] Eldar: There's no such thing as laziness. It doesn't exist. 

[01:21:05] Toliy: You're, 

[01:21:06] Eldar: you're procrastinating because of the fact that you don't wanna do this.

[01:21:10] Toliy: Well, that's what I just said. Yeah. This is not laziness. Yeah. This is not, no, no, 

[01:21:13] Eldar: no. This is the ability, laziness is the ability to procrastinate as much as possible to do something that you don't actually enjoy. That's it. Yes. 

[01:21:22] Toliy: Yeah. Okay. So then those people don't actually enjoy doing that thing. No, no, 

[01:21:27] Eldar: no, no, no.

[01:21:27] Eldar: So laziness is a, is an indicator. Is an indicator, yeah. Of intelligence. 

[01:21:37] Toliy: Well, it's an indicator. I, I don't know about intelligence. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's an indicator of preference. 

[01:21:42] Eldar: No, no, no, no, no. It's intelligence. 

[01:21:45] Toliy: But it's an indicator of preference. 

[01:21:47] Eldar: No, 

[01:21:48] Toliy: no. But how it's an indicator of, of, of intelligence 

[01:21:52] Eldar: is because, because, because you are doing all you can in order to fight back.

[01:21:57] Toliy: Yeah. But then you're still suffering from the results of what you're like not doing. 

[01:22:03] Eldar: That's only because you're still on the fence because you don't know. No. Then 

[01:22:06] Toliy: that's not intelligence yet. It is. It is No intelligence or, 

[01:22:09] Eldar: okay, fine. Okay, fine, fine, fine. 

[01:22:11] Toliy: Yeah. Okay. It, it's, it's, it's an indication of preference.

[01:22:14] Toliy: It's that you are indicating preference. Yeah. But you're not smart enough to take a, the proper action on what you actually prefer, for example. But does that not 

[01:22:24] Eldar: indicate that your soul still knows what's best for you? 

[01:22:27] Toliy: I mean, 

[01:22:28] Eldar: answer the fuck question. 

[01:22:30] Toliy: I, I, I, no. So. So what? The sole knows that sales is not what Harris should, should be doing.

[01:22:36] Eldar: No, it's not sales. So what is it? Sales is exactly what she should be doing. But, but there's obstacles around it. 

[01:22:46] Toliy: But there's like, like a lack of action of doing things right. 

[01:22:50] Eldar: Well, no, we just discovered one, right? Like, he's not supposed to succeed in his, in his mind he like, the hammer should drop. You know what I mean?

[01:22:56] Eldar: He, that's the hurdle. But the hammer 

[01:22:57] Toliy: is supposed to drop because you don't actually do anything in the timeframe you're supposed to. 

[01:23:01] Eldar: No, no, no. Because when he has conversations, he has people on there, right? Mm-hmm. Guess what happens? He gets excited. That tells me that he can find his way in sales. No people 

[01:23:14] Toliy: what?

[01:23:14] Toliy: Move forward, he gets excited. He gets excited. Yeah. But that's like a natural feeling. 

[01:23:18] Eldar: Well, yeah, because as he starts seeing success within those calls, right? Mm-hmm. As that starts building up mm-hmm. And he finds people to start buying because of what he's doing, he will connect those dots. It's inevitable.

[01:23:32] Eldar: That's why I think he's a natural sales guy. He's a natural 

[01:23:37] Eldar: sales guy. He wants his message to be heard, understood. And then people acting upon his message. 

[01:23:46] Toliy: How so? How does he want his message to be known and, and understood? 

[01:23:49] Eldar: Because he's, he's like, he's like outlandish about it. He's like, in what way? In ways that like, like, like the small rebuttals that he did have.

[01:23:58] Eldar: Like he, he stands behind them, like he agrees with them and he like really has a MPH behind them, even though we know that it's, he didn't do anything. Yeah, but what does that mean? That that means that he has an MPH behind it? That means that there's a natural, like want to succeed or wants to win. Like there's a competitive spirit there.

[01:24:17] Toliy: Okay. If he gets fired right now, is he gonna go for another sales job? 

[01:24:22] Eldar: I don't know that. 

[01:24:23] Toliy: Probably not. 

[01:24:24] Eldar: Okay, but why are you fucking doing the fucking thing? 

[01:24:26] Toliy: No. No. What I'm saying is that like, 

[01:24:28] Eldar: no, no, no, no. But I think that one day he'll end up somewhere within this realm. Doesn't matter what it is, even if it's not sales, if that's his natural order mm-hmm.

[01:24:39] Eldar: He, uh, he'll end up somewhere where he is competing and he's fighting for something that's inevitable. 

[01:24:46] Toliy: Okay. 

[01:24:48] Eldar: Are you not having fun? 

[01:24:52] Harris: I am, but I feel like Totally is trying to Yeah. Bring it down, man. 

[01:24:57] Eldar: No, no. Fuck. Totally. Fuck. Totally. Gimme your testimony, right? Like the times, the th the times, right? I'm not talking about when you make it a hundred calls and nobody answers Harris.

[01:25:06] Eldar: Yeah. I'm not talking about that part. That part is tough. I go, it could be gruesome. The time when a person picks up the phone and you are able to say your spiel and then give your rebuttals and stuff like that and go through the motions. Is it not exhilarating and you enjoy it? Oh, it is. You see. 

[01:25:24] Harris: It is. I mean, I have adrenaline rush every time something moves forward, you know?

[01:25:29] Harris: Yeah. No, but when someone lies or someone here, not when, no. He gives us rebuttals and no. When someone's like, you know, when I'm like, you wanna move forward? And they're like, yeah, I'd love to see your platform. I love do this. I get excited. I know the deal's not mo is not guaranteed to close. Yeah. But I get excited 'cause I naturally No, that's 

[01:25:45] Toliy: a natural feeling, right.

[01:25:45] Toliy: Of like, you're, if you, if if if someone's interested in continuing something forward Yeah. You should be like, like Yeah. And I think that it's like a guar like, and I think that that's what he wants. Yeah. But everybody wants that. 

[01:26:00] Eldar: No, I don't actually think so. So who wouldn't want that? Don't want the people who are much lower than, than sales.

[01:26:08] Mike: Like what? People who are just like, uh, come in as a robot. They don't really care about the job. Like her. Like her, yeah. Like a robot who like, like her, you make a sale. Sure. You don't make a sale. Sure. Yeah. It's just a job. They're just dare to show up like a body. I think 

[01:26:24] Eldar: that you are underestimating that he deeply inside knows that he has some kind of influence on how the shit's gonna go.

[01:26:34] Eldar: And I think he knows that, you know, that, you know that, that, 

[01:26:39] Harris: that you are empowered. You gotta understand clo closing a deal and getting that adrenaline is like a high, you see? Okay, well, trust 

[01:26:47] Toliy: me, I definitely kn know it. Yeah. But I also knew when I was at a point where, uh, I didn't have it, I didn't know it, and I was just like a moron.

[01:26:56] Toliy: Sure. You know? Sure. But what was that nonetheless? What, 

[01:27:00] Eldar: what was that? Why the fuck did you still persevered and chase that thing? 

[01:27:06] Toliy: Yeah. But like, like, I, I don't know. At, at least for me, I like, I always felt that like, like, I mean, I already told you the story, like in, in basketball. Mm-hmm. Right? Like when there's practice, when there's the summer and everyone is there practicing.

[01:27:20] Toliy: Right. Uh, and, and, and, uh, or I don't know if you've ever played, played with him, but he, he coached a lot like the, like the men's teams. It was, uh, Jimmy gra. Yeah. I played with him. And do you, do you, do you remember Coach Finley older guy? He was a Jewish guy with big beak? No, very fiery guy. Mm-hmm. No 

[01:27:40] Mike: Finley, no Coach Finley?

[01:27:41] Mike: No. Maybe by face. Yeah. 

[01:27:43] Toliy: Yeah. Yeah. His son was on the team. He was like a few years older. Mm-hmm. Than me. But he would always coach, like the summer he was in charge of summer and then he would bring in Jimmy Graff to like assist and stuff like that. Right. And those guys were like, oh, he fired up. Like, they're like, you know, Jimmy he was, he was fucking like, 

[01:27:57] Mike: yeah, he, Jim was a ranger, bro.

[01:28:00] Mike: He was like an old orange guy. Yeah. The dad, the old orange guy who 

[01:28:03] Eldar: owned the wreck. Not the fucking kid. Nah, that's Vinny. Okay. Yeah. And I played with him plenty of times. No, his dad. The dad, the old man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Fi the rager. He was 

[01:28:11] Toliy: fiery. Like he was a fucking, it was a crazy, he was angry.

[01:28:15] Toliy: Always fi Yeah. Wreck. He was the guy who, 

[01:28:17] Mike: who ran the wreck. Yeah. You for forgot him, bro. Yeah. D ran 

[01:28:20] Toliy: the rec center. 

[01:28:21] Mike: He was the boss. Yeah. He 

[01:28:23] Toliy: was always 

[01:28:24] Eldar: orange guy from a little guy. Oh yeah. He's an alcoholic, right? 

[01:28:27] Mike: Yeah, I think so. I saw Hi. Yes, you're 

[01:28:28] Eldar: right. You mean alcoholic? He's alcoholic. He's an alcoholic.

[01:28:31] Eldar: Yes. 

[01:28:32] Mike: He's an alcoholic, like the, uh, AC every night. Yeah. 

[01:28:36] Eldar: Yeah. I remember this. He's, of those people would say like, yeah. That, that guy's like he drink too much. He is always red. Yes. 

[01:28:41] Mike: He was always like, raging. Yes. He would always be angry. 

[01:28:44] Toliy: Yeah, yeah. Whatever, whatever. What's the point? Yeah. That, that like, they would always run these like summer things and then during the season they, they would help too.

[01:28:53] Toliy: And like, like I had a huge attachment. Like I wanted to make the team, I wanted to play, like I wanted all these things. Right. Okay. And then it, it re repetitively like, it, it didn't happen. And like, I had way more reasons to quit. Then not then, then to keep doing what I was doing because I was getting, no, there was no indications of progress for me.

[01:29:12] Toliy: Okay. Right. But I knew that I wasn't gonna be the one that was like, like I wasn't going to the one that's gonna say like, I'm done. Like, I needed them. I needed to keep, keep going and them continue to not play me. But I, I, I was there ready to go. Right. Okay. Like, I, I, I, I was not gonna let like myself be the one that says, I'm, I'm done, guys.

[01:29:31] Toliy: Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. And then like them, like, right. So, um, I would play through crazy exhaustion. Everyone's like, tired, like, yeah. Like they can't move. And like, I would never care. There, there was no chance that I would like quit in like any kind of way, no matter how physically exhausting I was.

[01:29:48] Toliy: Mm-hmm. Because like, I knew that like, okay, everyone's tired right now. Yeah. Right. So in my head I was always like, this is my time to like, like, like shine. And there would be plenty of times, especially in those summer things where they would. Recognize that. Mm-hmm. And they would see it. Mm-hmm. That like, there was there that like, I wasn't gonna lose 'cause I was gonna get out worked, or like mm-hmm.

[01:30:07] Toliy: I didn't have like, grit or like, stuff like that. Like, okay. That was never gonna happen. 

[01:30:12] Toliy: Okay. 

[01:30:13] Toliy: So like, I always felt that, like, I had like that kind of like thing where I was like, like, there, there's no way I'm gonna give up. What the fuck is your point? Well, no, my, my, my my my point was that like, like, like I, I wasn't a person that was going to like give up or like stop, like I was relentless.

[01:30:30] Toliy: Like in in, in that way. That that's how he always felt. 

[01:30:33] Mike: Okay. That's his testimony. I just wanted, yeah. I just wanna say that was just his testimony's. My 

[01:30:36] Toliy: t yeah. That's, that's, that's testimony. That's a big kicker. That's a 

[01:30:39] Mike: big kicker. But 

[01:30:40] Eldar: Harris has the same thing. What? Harris has the same thing. Well like Sure.

[01:30:44] Eldar: Yeah. I mean, he's like, I'm not gonna stop coming. I'm gonna keep coming. I'm gonna keep trying. You're gonna have to get rid of me. Yeah. We're we're arguing that look, it's not gonna be us. That's gonna get rid of you. It's gonna be you who's gonna get rid of you. By not doing the things that actually make you successful.

[01:31:05] Eldar: Right. Okay. If you don't want to grow, if you don't wanna learn, if you don't want to be curious, if you don't want to be nice, you are gonna see it. You're gonna see the door yourself. It's gonna be very clear. He's saying, look, I'm on the fence. We're trying to make an argument here. That's what it is, Harris.

[01:31:23] Eldar: We're trying to make an argument that this side is better than your side, whether you like it or not, and you understand our side a little bit more. Right? I just explained to you some of the things. Be punctual, do your 

[01:31:38] Eldar: job, be consistent, be curious, be nice, simple stuff. You know this stuff. 

[01:31:47] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:31:50] Eldar: Now how he's gonna take it, that's on him.

[01:31:53] Eldar: We've done this many times, 

[01:31:57] Eldar: you know? So it, it shouldn't be, uh, a random hammer that comes out of nowhere. You never know what's gonna come. Oh, it's gonna come when he chooses to come. I think the faith is in him, because I'm not willing to give up on him if he's give, if he keeps trying, if I keep seeing that he's trying and he wants to learn, he wants to be better.

[01:32:17] Eldar: Uh, like I don't have it in me to fire him. I don't, you know that. Totally. 

[01:32:23] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:32:24] Eldar: I want the person to, to say bye themselves. 

[01:32:26] Harris: Yeah. 

[01:32:28] Eldar: You know, like, Hey, that's the end of the road. 

[01:32:32] Eldar: We tried our best, but it's not working out. It is what it is. You know? If he is not trying, then it is. What? It's Mike, I'll be here.

[01:32:45] Eldar: What do you think?

[01:32:49] Eldar: Yeah, no, I agree. You know, you got nothing. All right. The 

[01:32:54] Eldar: wall's gonna be there, Mike. 

[01:32:56] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:32:57] Eldar: Whether you give up on it on yourself. Mm-hmm. It's gonna be there. Mm-hmm. Today, tomorrow it's gonna be there. Yeah. You decide not to go to the gym. Mm-hmm. We're all still there. No, I know. 

[01:33:09] Mike: No, I'm not deciding to do that.

[01:33:10] Mike: I'm not giving up on myself. You, there you go. That's what I said. I was like, 

[01:33:13] Eldar: as long as you don't give up on yourself. No, no. Then you're still kicking. Then you're still trying. I still persevering. Still persevering. Yeah. Yeah. A hundred percent. You know what I mean? You'll figure this thing out. Yeah. One day or another.

[01:33:21] Eldar: Yeah, sure. It might take you a hundred thousand years. Yeah. But we will get it possible, you know? Yeah. You'll get it. 

[01:33:26] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's up to you. And that's what perseverance, I think is, is, is up to you. Mm-hmm. 

[01:33:38] Eldar: It's up to those seals. It's up to them, you know? And I think that we have these moments where we can be the seals, despite the fact that they're displaying this, all this courage, this.

[01:33:50] Eldar: Heroism and all this other nonsense. 

[01:33:53] Harris: Yeah, that's because you gotta understand it looks 

[01:33:55] Eldar: cool. No, they make cool videos. Right. I can make 

[01:33:58] Harris: a very cool video of Harris. These guys, these guys to a point, get brainwashed. 

[01:34:05] Eldar: Well, that's what it is here too. Like Yeah, I know, but you know what I mean. Where ultimately we're trying to brainwash you into what?

[01:34:12] Eldar: Into our worldview. That our worldview actually owns yours. Yeah. You are the negative Nancy that comes here and says, shit's bad, or this or that. Right? We're like, no, my man. Like this is how you can look at the world if you want, and if you don't want to, then it's not gonna mesh. It's oil and water. If not, it's not gonna work.

[01:34:30] Eldar: The door's right there, we don't give a fuck. 'cause if you're not compatible, trust me, there's not gonna be, we're not gonna be cry crying over you. We're not. You're not compatible. That's it. Gigs up. You're saying, look, I like traveling with you guys. I like hanging out with you guys. I like. Doing all this stuff with you.

[01:34:50] Eldar: I like the podcast. I like all this stuff. Good. What are you gonna do about it? How do you make, how do you kind of make sure that the hammer doesn't drop on your head? 

[01:34:59] Toliy: Yeah. Like that, that's always like the, uh, to, to, I know, to me, like the main, uh, yeah, one of the main kickers variables. Yes. But then like the actions usually prove that like, there are no actions being done or like there's not enough being done to push that button to like, like, you know, to like, to commit.

[01:35:17] Toliy: Yeah. To like teeter over that line because like, you don't have to like go ball to the walls. And I'm not talking about like, okay, like we're not even here doing that at 5:00 AM and then like stay till midnight and then fall. We we're not David Goggins. Yeah, definitely Stop it. Fall, fall asleep and do that.

[01:35:33] Toliy: You can do a little bit Yes. But do it consistently. Correct. Right. Then you can guarantee that there's no hammer or they Correct. And, and like oftentimes for, for me at least, it's like, um, like, like if, if, if I'm doing well at something like that, it's usually because I'm actually doing just what I'm supposed to be doing.

[01:35:51] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:35:52] Toliy: Or, or more. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. But I'm doing it. 

[01:35:54] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:35:55] Toliy: And I'm actually doing it. And then when there's like a judgment time or something like that, like, uh, like there's no like, uh, like doubts, like Yeah. Like, hey, like let's see what it's, what it's been done, or something like that. Because I already know the work's been put in.

[01:36:10] Eldar: That's right. 

[01:36:10] Toliy: You know, and like then when I also want to accomplish so something and do, do something like every, every time I like, um, I'll talk to you or I'll ask you like, about it. Like, I always leave the meeting or like, I always leave the conversation with knowing that like, hey, like it's up to you.

[01:36:29] Toliy: You know? And then you need to make decisions as to like, what are you gonna do about it? That's right. Right, that's right. But like, you like that, that like. That challenge as, as to like, like you've been challenging me that for like 10 plus years, always about like, what are you gonna do about it? Mm-hmm.

[01:36:45] Toliy: What are you gonna do about it? What are you gonna do about it? And then like, if you never actually do something about it or like run, run with that and all you need to do, I, I, I think oftentimes all you need to do is, um, answer that question one time and actually do something about it. And then you actually feel what that felt like and you can replicate that rush.

[01:37:09] Toliy: Like we, we talk about Right. Without like having to close a deal or something like that. 'cause like, you were able to actually do that thing in like, in the practice portion of it, for example. 

[01:37:21] Toliy: Mm. 

[01:37:21] Toliy: Like if, if you want to call it that, right? 

[01:37:23] Toliy: Mm-hmm. But 

[01:37:24] Toliy: that's like, that's the number one challenge always. Like, what are you gonna do about it?

[01:37:29] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:37:31] Toliy: What are you gonna do about it? What are you gonna do about it? What are you gonna do about it? 

[01:37:36] Harris: Stop attacking me, man. 

[01:37:38] Toliy: Well, what are you gonna do about it? Yeah. And then like, you have to ask yourself nothing. Mm-hmm. Or something, 

[01:37:45] Eldar: right? Yeah. Are you gonna try? Right. 

[01:37:47] Toliy: It's, it's almost like if there, if there is a hammer, let's just say there's a floating hammer, right?

[01:37:51] Toliy: Mm-hmm. Every time you ask yourself that question and you do something about it, you almost like erase a portion of it, right? Yeah. And then with enough times, you can't even see it anymore. The, the hammer doesn't exist. Yeah. The hammer doesn't even exist because you've actually done something about it.

[01:38:08] Toliy: Yes. Multiple times over and over again. And now this hammer that you talk about, you don't even know what it, 

[01:38:15] Mike: what it's, no, I, I'm not sure if you guys talking about the same thing that I was thinking about, but the hammer is the actual negative self-talk. There is no actual, uh, well, I'm not, there is no actual hammer.

[01:38:26] Mike: There's a hammer. It's, it's the reason. But there is, 

[01:38:29] Eldar: but the hammer, it's 

[01:38:30] Mike: you self-created. Yeah. But it's super necessary. It is. And until you find out, address those things that you, you know, whatever, that you don't, you know, that's telling you like, oh, I'm not good enough for this. I'm not, funny enough, I'm not good looking enough or I'm not smart enough.

[01:38:45] Mike: Whatever. 

[01:38:45] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:38:46] Mike: Until you address those things and you say, fuck that, I don't believe it. Yeah. You know, nothing's gonna change. The hammer is the, the story, the fucking rainy day that you sold yourself and you believed Harris, we do a very 

[01:39:00] Eldar: good job at showing you the mirror. Every time you look at me, you are looking at yourself.

[01:39:12] Harris: Yo, why? Why? You gotta make it sound creepy, man. You like ghost stories? 

[01:39:16] Harris: Yeah. Am I gonna be so, I'm gonna look like you when I'm 40 over the future. I'm Oh, you wish man. 

[01:39:22] Harris: Whoa, whoa. What do you mean? I wish you wish man look like me. 

[01:39:25] Harris: Hello man. 

[01:39:27] Harris: Listen, 

[01:39:29] Eldar: we have the ability I. To allow you to do whatever it is that you want, and we're trying to bounce that stuff back right at you.

[01:39:37] Eldar: Mm-hmm. 

[01:39:38] Eldar: That's it. The, the destiny's in your own hands. That's what we believe. Mm-hmm. So when you fail, if you fail, it's on you. Yeah. It's on you always. Don't blame us. Don't come over here with a shotgun trying to kill us. What the fuck, bro? What the fuck, man? Why do you go there, bro? Because you are numb nuts.

[01:39:58] Eldar: You know what I mean? I'm not a psychotic motherfucker. Well take you taking your meds though. No, you did say that. What up, bud? You did say that. So 

[01:40:05] Harris: Yeah. I've never gone off them once, man. Yeah, 

[01:40:08] Toliy: of course. You're a psychotic motherfucker. Look at the meds you take. 

[01:40:11] Harris: Yeah. 

[01:40:11] Toliy: You 

[01:40:11] Harris: haven't even seen the meds I take, 

[01:40:13] Toliy: man.

[01:40:13] Toliy: Exactly, exactly, man. That's why you're psychotic. 

[01:40:16] Eldar: Okay. 

[01:40:17] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:40:18] Eldar: But the truth of the matter is I don't believe that either. Right. I think that we can challenge that whatever it is that they put on you. Mm-hmm. The mindset that they put on you one day, 

[01:40:28] Harris: but not that 

[01:40:30] Eldar: Wow. You've been getting good at this. 

[01:40:33] Harris: I've been hearing that.

[01:40:34] Harris: Uh, every time Tony comes in or says something one day. 

[01:40:40] Eldar: That's right. Yeah. 

[01:40:41] Harris: And I don't even let him finish the sentence anymore. One day putting, not today. That's right. 

[01:40:46] Toliy: But do you know who used to tell me that? The time him? 

[01:40:50] Harris: Yeah. Well that sounds like LR. Hmm. 

[01:40:56] Toliy: So are we saying anything about perseverance?

[01:40:59] Toliy: What are you gonna do about it? 

[01:41:00] Harris: Oh, shit. I can't just spit down an answer right now, man. No, no. 

[01:41:04] Toliy: I'm gonna be saying that every day Going forward. 

[01:41:07] Harris: Yeah. 

[01:41:07] Toliy: All the time. 

[01:41:08] Harris: Good 

[01:41:09] Eldar: to it. You know why he wants to do that is because he actually believes that you have Alzheimer's. Wow. And ultimately Harris, don't put me in with Sleepy Jones Harris.

[01:41:20] Eldar: And ultimately, I think that's what we're trying to do. We're trying to make sure that we don't get Alzheimer's, because I think that I. I think that's the ultimate disease. Like the, that's the ultimate disease that is needs to be solved. Mm-hmm. Because we're trying to figure this thing out for the next life.

[01:41:40] Eldar: Because that gets erased as well. Yeah. The soul gets erased and then we start over kind of thing. Blah, da da. Mm-hmm. You know? So I think Alzheimer's is a big thing. 

[01:41:51] Harris: Get back to the Reation. 

[01:41:53] Eldar: We can't hear you hear. Yeah. It's all like tight. I think Harris, but ultimately what we're trying to do, or totally is trying to do, is trying to help you out by reminding you every single day, what are you gonna do about it.

[01:42:05] Eldar: Mm-hmm. You pussy, 

[01:42:07] Harris: uh, 

[01:42:08] Eldar: you going there again, man, I want to see whether or not it works on you. Just like it works on Mike. Right. But Mike's like, oh, you pu shit. Why you keep breathing into the mic? Shit, you're not gonna do shit, man. Fuck you man. And all of a sudden Mike plays better defense. Yeah. Let me know.

[01:42:28] Toliy: Oh my bad. What are you gonna do about it? 

[01:42:32] Harris: Oh, what are you gonna do about it? 

[01:42:36] Toliy: I'm gonna do everything about it. 

[01:42:38] Mike: He's gonna eat a, a nice juicy pie. I think. I thought you were going somewhere else. That's disgusting, man. 

[01:42:45] Harris: Listen man, 

[01:42:46] Mike: you are always thinking about Cox, man. Yes, man. That's you bro. 

[01:42:49] Harris: Yeah, I have present for you, but you have to accept it.

[01:42:52] Harris: Did you win that competition or no? What competition? 

[01:42:55] Toliy: The swallowing one. Oh, fuck you, man. You gave him second. That's nice. Fuck you. 

[01:43:00] Eldar: So what are some of our final thoughts on the perseverance?

[01:43:06] Eldar: Yeah. Negative self-talk. Yeah. Wow. Negative self-talk. Always. Well, 

[01:43:14] Mike: you're asking me a serious question. 

[01:43:15] Toliy: I didn't think about that. Yeah. So, but wait, do you, do you guys think that negative self-talk is a result of a. A long time of not doing anything about it. 

[01:43:25] Mike: You're trying to set a new topic. Yeah. 

[01:43:29] Eldar: That's crazy.

[01:43:31] Mike: How, uh, how a self-talk No. Is injustice against yourself, not being checked, violating yourself, not being checked, allowing to get shitted on and not, not checking it, not not respecting yourself, not standing up for yourself. And then you start to create these things, 

[01:43:52] Eldar: these narratives about yourself and you start to believe them.

[01:43:57] Eldar: But or not true. 

[01:43:59] Toliy: You're saying 

[01:44:01] Mike: they're true, but the re are they irrelevant? Like, so what if you got a three inch deck, Harris, oh fuck. Who care? The fuck. 

[01:44:08] Harris: Stop spreading fake news, man. 

[01:44:11] Mike: You know, that's average size in China. Fuck you man. You move to China, you're a big dick 

[01:44:16] Harris: king. You're gonna be like King Kong.

[01:44:18] Harris: Yeah. Stop spreading fake news, man. 

[01:44:20] Mike: You know the, the things they're true, but the relevance and how they control your life, you know? 

[01:44:27] Toliy: Yeah. But I feel like if you were to do something about it, those things will go away. Guaranteed. 

[01:44:34] Mike: What do you mean to do something about it? 

[01:44:35] Toliy: Like whatever you, negative self-talk you have on different things.

[01:44:40] Toliy: Mm-hmm. I think it's a result of you, like in that field, being a pisser for a long time. And then you developed this like particular attitude towards different things 

[01:44:51] Mike: in life. Well, negative self-talk is just, you reiterate, it's just you speaking out loud what you believe about yourself. Yeah. But you have reasons as to why you believe it.

[01:44:58] Mike: Of course. 'cause you've been violated and you all been allowing yourself to be violated for a long time. 

[01:45:03] Toliy: Well, I don't think that you've been violated. I think you've been, you, you've been. Choosing to do particular a actions 

[01:45:10] Mike: well, yeah. You violating yourself and then other people violate you as well. 

[01:45:14] Toliy: Well, I don't think those people are violating you 

[01:45:17] Mike: from whose perspective?

[01:45:18] Mike: Your perspective or their perspective. 

[01:45:21] Eldar: No, I think that they're giving you justice. Yeah. 

[01:45:23] Mike: They're giving you exactly what you deserve. You deserve. Okay, 

[01:45:26] Eldar: so you 

[01:45:26] Mike: allowing them to violate you. Yes. That's what he's talking about. Yeah. 

[01:45:29] Eldar: Sure. Right. I mean, that's a, that's a very different thing. Yeah. 

[01:45:32] Toliy: Because you being violated is your Yes.

[01:45:34] Toliy: You're a victim of something Yes. Of a crime. You're allowing 

[01:45:36] Mike: yourself to be violated. Right? Correct. Okay, sure. Sure. I agreed. 

[01:45:39] Toliy: Right. Um, so, so, um, yeah, I think it's a, uh, it, it, it just like you're, you believe that about yourself or you believe that it's true and it prob like, and it probably is to a certain extent, right?

[01:45:54] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:45:55] Toliy: But I think it, it, it happens from a long time of you not doing anything about it, or you not taking any actions to put yourself in like a. Better position. Mm-hmm. Correct. But I think when you start doing that and you start taking these actions, like, like, I don't know, like, like, um, any one of us here, like if we're good at something, right?

[01:46:15] Toliy: Try to convincing yourself that you're bad at it, for example. Mm-hmm. Try, try making some negative self-talk right now. Mm-hmm. Make up some ne negative self-talk on something that you are actually competent in. 

[01:46:26] Mike: Mm-hmm. Right. Good point. Well, you definitely can't convince yourself you can't do that. It's possible.

[01:46:31] Mike: Only others could. Maybe that's, possibly could. You don't have some ified 

[01:46:34] Toliy: or, or, or things where there are some truth to it. That's right. You definitely can't. That's right. And you can also break through like one way or another with some like motivation or with somebody's, like somebody else's like energy and believing in you, right?

[01:46:47] Toliy: Mm-hmm. Yeah. For example, right? 

[01:46:49] Eldar: No, you can't. You cannot break through. No, no, 

[01:46:52] Toliy: no. I'm saying like, moment, you can try it for moment 

[01:46:55] Eldar: of time. Yeah. And it might work. Yeah. No, it's not gonna be, but you're be like a, like a 

[01:46:59] Toliy: permanent breakthrough for yourself. No. Yeah. Good. Okay. No, no, no. I'm saying like, if you don't believe in the moment, somebody could help you believe more or help do for, for that time.

[01:47:09] Toliy: But then you're also for the moment reliant on them to bring that out of you for That's right. For example. Right. That's right. But yeah, like I, I view that like as soon as you, um, take action, as soon as you, um, have a, like a relentless desire to ask for help or to like, improve and are, are ready and willing to take action.

[01:47:29] Toliy: Like, like, I, I don't believe the people who are ready, willing and able that, that everybody out there doesn't have someone out there mm-hmm. That's ready to take that an energy and help them harvest it. Like I'm, I'm, I'm not sure if that like, like exists. Mm. Like I feel like there's always. Everyone's life.

[01:47:48] Toliy: A harvester of the ready, ready, willing, and able person. 

[01:47:53] Toliy: Yeah. 

[01:47:53] Toliy: Who, who, who is like, ready, willing, and able, and like mm-hmm. Oh, no. No one's giving 'em a chance. No one's like, you know, like this or like, I, I don't know if that like exists. Yeah. Because people can feel that kind of e like energy. 

[01:48:06] Toliy: Mm-hmm. 

[01:48:07] Toliy: And what one, once it's felt like there's no, like, denying of that person at that time.

[01:48:14] Toliy: Mm-hmm. For whatever it's 

[01:48:16] Harris: mm-hmm. 

[01:48:18] Toliy: Right. You know, so I just remembered like, like that car guy, right. If he, if he walks in here enough times, it may only be one more time, it may be 10 times, right? Mm-hmm. If he comes into others, like other, you guys have an office here, right? It's important for you guys to be in a clean atmosphere, 

[01:48:35] Toliy: right?

[01:48:36] Toliy: Mm-hmm. 

[01:48:36] Toliy: I'm gonna make sure this place is spotless. Mm-hmm. I'm gonna make sure this place is taken, taken care of. Yeah. Right? I guarantee you if he acts a particular way. Or gives you enough reasons of like a particular way you cannot deny him. I agree. 'cause he's ready, willing, and able. 

[01:48:52] Toliy: Yes. 

[01:48:52] Toliy: Right? Yes. And there's a particular energy that that person will carry, correct?

[01:48:56] Toliy: Yes. And you wanna align with that? Of course. Yeah. You're gonna, you're gonna feel that and be like, whoa, this person really wants to take care of this office and make sure that we're like in like a position to succeed and they're willing to do this. They're ready to do that. They bring that energy, like they're asking this and that, that's an undeniable thing.

[01:49:12] Toliy: But people are always in this like mode. It's like, I'm ready to do whatever. Like, 'cause Right. For example, I'm ready to do whatever, listen to whatever, right? Mm-hmm. I just need a chance. Or like someone, no one's giving a chance, you know? Like, that doesn't exist. Yeah. 

[01:49:25] Mike: First you have to put yourself in the position, you know?

[01:49:27] Toliy: Yeah. Before anybody else can. That's what I'm saying is that there's, there's the people who are ready, willing, and able. Then there's the harvesters of, of that out there. Yeah. Right. The pe the, the people that, that, that will make that happen once they actually see that and feel that. 

[01:49:42] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:49:43] Toliy: You know, so.

[01:49:45] Toliy: Well, we, we were talking about in the negative, um, self-talk. Like I think that there's truth to it and I think it's a matter of like actually doing something and then it's, it can't exist that there's no way it, it, it's like anxiety, right? It's like it mm-hmm. Any of these like things. Right? Yeah. I agree.

[01:50:03] Toliy: Like they actually, like, it doesn't actually exist when it doesn't need to anymore. Mm-hmm. It only exists when, when you need it to actually exist. Right. You know? 

[01:50:14] Mike: Yeah. Well, yeah. It's, when it's not, it's not irrelevant. It's irrelevant and it's it's 

[01:50:18] Toliy: irrelevant. Yeah. 

[01:50:20] Mike: When it's 

[01:50:21] Toliy: irrelevant, but it's gonna be t for a very long time.

[01:50:24] Eldar: Yeah. 

[01:50:24] Toliy: If you need it to be relevant for you. 

[01:50:26] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Yeah. 

[01:50:27] Toliy: You know, you 

[01:50:27] Eldar: have the reasons for it. 

[01:50:29] Toliy: Yeah, 

[01:50:29] Eldar: yeah, yeah. Of course. You the power 

[01:50:30] Toliy: Yeah. To it. Yeah. You're feeding it, you're feeding it. Yes. You're feeding it. Yeah. Yeah. 

[01:50:34] Eldar: Correct. 

[01:50:34] Toliy: Yeah. And once you stop feeding it, 

[01:50:36] Eldar: yeah. 

[01:50:36] Toliy: It can't exist anymore. It can't exist 

[01:50:38] Eldar: anymore.

[01:50:38] Eldar: It's gone. You move on. Mm-hmm. That's, that's right. Alright. Totally. What's the final thoughts on perseverance? 

[01:50:43] Toliy: Final thoughts on per perseverance? Um, 

[01:50:47] Eldar: how you next? 

[01:50:48] Toliy: Yeah. I feel like per perseverance is never like, um, a battle, like somebody versus something or like someone, it's always like a, like I, I I think it's the like, like proper per like, perseverance is probably the realization, um, that like the battles within you and that the power is within you.

[01:51:10] Harris: Mm. 

[01:51:11] Toliy: And I think that like once you realize that right, and you actually believe that and you actually have the reasons to like, believe that, then you can like persevere. But for as long as you believe that it's like you versus the world or you versus somebody else, or you versus something, the, there's no chance you're gonna persevere.

[01:51:30] Eldar: I have a crazy question tied to this then, Harris. That's a very good point. Perseverance. Why don't we skip you? While you get, gather your thoughts. Mm-hmm. Because you sound, you look a little disheveled, so I'm pretty sure you're gonna sound terribly. Um, since this is an audio podcast. 

[01:51:48] Toliy: Yeah. You look like an animal right now.

[01:51:49] Toliy: Serious. That strictly lives in the mud. Serious? 

[01:51:52] Harris: Yeah. I continue to fight. Oh my God. Um, and why? That's a good thing, man. It is a good thing. You gotta continue to fight. Yeah. You're doing your best right now to squeeze something out. 

[01:52:02] Toliy: But why do you have to continue to fight? 

[01:52:03] Harris: Why? Yeah. Yeah. 

[01:52:04] Toliy: For what? '

[01:52:05] Harris: cause you gotta get to where you want to be in life.

[01:52:07] Harris: Why, why? Unless you're gonna be unhappy, man. Oh. Says who? What the fuck is all this? Man? He woke you up. Yeah. No one's fucking doing this. And you're, I'm, I'm not like you 

[01:52:19] Toliy: talking to that. Client's gonna give up mid conversation. Walk away. Oh, he ain't a buyer. I'm done with him. You know. 

[01:52:25] Harris: No, I didn't say I was done with him, man.

[01:52:27] Toliy: You were done with him, man. 

[01:52:28] Harris: Listen, if this was five months before, man, I wouldn't have even threw those, uh, challenges. He would've offered to suck him off. What is wrong with you, man, man, for a meeting. I don't even throw those challenges, man. I, I would've just been stuck. Mm-hmm. Wouldn't have said a word.

[01:52:48] Harris: Let me ask 

[01:52:49] Eldar: you one question before you continue this. Mm. Alright. It's a sales question. Even though some of the prospects that call us to use our service, okay. And sure they want to use our service to be better or to get more sales, or to drive more clients to their business, right? 

[01:53:12] Eldar: How many times out of those, uh, efforts or 

[01:53:19] Eldar: fucking, what do you call them, chances that they do what they do, what they ask for is that Totally.

[01:53:27] Eldar: Or someone who's on the other line actually challenges them in such a way? They end up succeeding, but never tie it back to the conversation that they had with that rap. 

[01:53:47] Harris: Probably, I'd say 99% of the time. 

[01:53:50] Eldar: Alright, cool. Thank you. Did you, you understood what I said? Yeah. 

[01:53:54] Harris: He challenges them in a way that really makes them think.

[01:53:58] Harris: Yes, but they never realize the only way, they only reason they're succeeding is because Totally. That's right. Made them open their mind up a little bit. 

[01:54:07] Eldar: Correct. And now how many times, but he doesn't, in a way, how many times did Toley actually realized that that's actually going on that before their business was at one level.

[01:54:19] Eldar: Right. And then he challenged them to the next level. I can't answer that. And then our service helped them get to the next level. 

[01:54:29] Harris: I can't answer that because I'm not totally, I'm gonna. Keep sticking it through, and I'm gonna try to keep, uh, working at it, man. All right. Perseverance. Mm-hmm. Mike? 

[01:54:43] Mike: No, I really have nothing, uh, to add, but I just thought when we were talking earlier, I remember, uh, you probably remember this, I one in the first, like in the beginning, maybe in the middle of the time we, since we started climbing.

[01:54:57] Mike: Yeah. There was one day me and you went, and I was going on this one trail for a very long time. Mm-hmm. Like I was battling it. Mm-hmm. And I think, and I said, I'm not fucking leaving until I the other shit done today. Okay. Do you remember this? 

[01:55:10] Eldar: I do remember you saying something like that. Did you get it? 

[01:55:12] Mike: I did get it.

[01:55:13] Mike: You did? But I myself bought into it like, yo, I'm not giving up on this. Like, okay, I'm gonna see this shit through today. 

[01:55:19] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Which one was it? I don't remember. Okay. 

[01:55:22] Mike: But you know the ones that, one of the ones that I was having a hard time with. Okay. Probably working on a couple days. Oh, I think it was the green one on the right.

[01:55:28] Mike: Yeah. Maybe, yeah. Yes. Oh, the green one. The green one, correct. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Because you maybe placing your, your hands wrong. Yes, yes. Maybe that one or something. Yeah. Yeah. And I kept, you know, trying, trying. You did it. I did it, yes. And I said, I'm not leaving until I, uh, 

[01:55:42] Eldar: get it. 

[01:55:43] Mike: I get it. But I wasn't saying it like I actually believed it, and I, like, I had the confidence when I said it.

[01:55:48] Mike: Mm-hmm. And I had the confidence in myself, like I know I could do it. Yeah. And I, obviously, I didn't understand the moment what's happening when I was saying it. Mm-hmm. But I was like, guess I'm saying like, I'm not gonna let my mental, not let me do this physically. Mm-hmm. You know, like I wasn't gonna let it beat me down, you know?

[01:56:03] Toliy: Mm-hmm. 

[01:56:04] Mike: So, 

[01:56:06] Toliy: Hmm. 

[01:56:06] Mike: So, um, so you had some kind of inclination or inkling that you were gonna get it? I had like the belief that I know I could do it. But like, maybe I was given up too early or like Mm. 'cause I knew I had the strength and I knew I had the ability. Mm-hmm. But I also wanted to like prove to myself and to persevere.

[01:56:23] Mike: Yeah. That you can do it. That I'm gonna be able to do it. Yeah. I didn't understand why I said it, but that's just how I felt and I said it. Do 

[01:56:27] Eldar: you have 

[01:56:27] Mike: that 

[01:56:28] Eldar: inkling? Do you get this? 

[01:56:30] Harris: I'm still, you know, I don't know. 

[01:56:32] Eldar: You don't know yet? No. Okay. That's, that's honest. That's interesting. 

[01:56:37] Mike: Yeah. But the negative self-talk is a big one, so I'm gonna be thinking about that.

[01:56:41] Eldar: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. I think that the negative self-talk is, is very tied to the perseverance part. Mm-hmm. 

[01:56:49] Mike: Yeah. 

[01:56:50] Eldar: You know what I mean? I think that a lot of the times we are the ones who are standing, uh, you know, on our own path of. Succeeding. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? It's just we don't know or don't actually pay attention to what's actually going on and how that negative self-talk.

[01:57:06] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:57:07] Eldar: It's so maybe low vibration or very low and silent almost. Mm-hmm. Whispering in our ear that like, nope. Mm-hmm You ain't getting this, you suck. Yeah. You, you're not good enough. Mm-hmm. You ugly, you fat, you whatever it is, you know, that you're telling yourself, but the truth of the matter is you have more to give, you have more to do.

[01:57:25] Eldar: Mm-hmm. You have more, more energy. You know what I mean? Um, if you can stop believing that stuff. Mm-hmm. I think perseverance is almost a natural phenomenon. Mm-hmm. That's it. 

[01:57:39] Harris: Mm-hmm. 

[01:57:41] Eldar: Bye guys. Yeah. Thank you guys so much. This.